George Carlin Quotes About War

Quotes about: War

• Have you ever noticed that the only metaphor we have in our public discourse for solving problems is to declare war on it? We have the war on crime, the war on
  cancer, the war on drugs. But did you ever notice that we have no war on homelessness? You know why? Because there's no money in that problem. No money to be made off of the homeless. If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty damn quick!

  George Carlin

  War, Cancer, America

• War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.

  George Carlin

  War, Men, Class

• Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

  George Carlin

  Funny, Witty, Peace

  "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television". Stand-up act, edition.cnn.com. 1972.

• When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. It will not be with jack-boots. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Germany lost the Second World War. Fascism won it. Believe me, my friend.

  George Carlin

  Nike, Philosophy, War

  "Real Time" with Bill Maher, September 9, 2005.

• You know why we're good at it? Because we get a lot of practice. This country is only 200 years old, and already we've had ten major wars. We average a major war every twenty years. So we're good at it!

  George Carlin

  Country, War, Humorous

  George Carlin (2002). “Napalm & Silly Putty”, Hyperion

• All patriarchal societies are either preparing for war, at war, or recovering from war.

  George Carlin

  War, Patriarchal Society, Recovering

• Something is wrong. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, crime, torture, corruption and the ice capades. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. This is not what you expect to find on the resume of a supreme being. It's what you expect from an office temp with a bad attitude.

  George Carlin

  Attitude, War, Ice

• How is it possible to have a civil war?

  George Carlin

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

• So about 80 years after the Constitution is ratified, the slaves are freed. Not so you'd really notice it of course; just kinda on paper. And that of course was at the end of the Civil War. Now there is another phrase I dearly love. That is a true oxymoron if I've ever heard one: "Civil War." Do you think anybody in this country could ever really have a civil war? "Say, pardon me?" (shoots gun) "I'm awfully sorry. Awfully sorry."

  George Carlin

  Country, Sorry, Philosophy

  "What Am I Doing in New Jersey?". Live album by George Carlin, 1988.

• The bloodiest, most brutal wars fought, all based on religious hatred. Which is fine with me! Any time a bunch of holy people want to go out and kill each other I'm a happy guy!

  George Carlin

  Religious, War, People

• President George Bush declared a National Day of Prayer for Peace. This was after he had carefully arranged and started the war.

  George Carlin

  Prayer, War, President

• Germany lost the Second World War. Fascism won it. Believe me, my friend.

  George Carlin

  War, Believe, Germany

  "Real Time" with Bill Maher, September 9, 2005.

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