David Letterman Quotes About John Kerry

Quotes about: John Kerry

• Over the weekend, John Kerry - the big John Kerry juggernaut moves on - he won primaries in Washington D.C., Nevada and, I think, Canada. And he's so confident that he's started nailing that intern again.

  David Letterman

  Moving, Weekend, Thinking

• How about this John Kerry controversy? So he's out there in California, tells some kind of joke and it backfires. He's saying he botched the joke. ... This guy can lose elections he's not even in.

  David Letterman

  California, Guy, Election

• John Kerry went duck hunting and he's doing that to fulfill his campaign pledge to hunt down the ducks and kill them wherever they are! Kerry did pretty well; he came back with four ducks and three Purple Hearts.

  David Letterman

  Heart, Hunting, Purple

  "Trail Tales: Gore Returns to Florida". "Late Show" with David Letterman, www.foxnews.com. October 22, 2004.

• John Kerry told Tom Ridge he was too busy to receive a Homeland Security briefing. I thought that was odd, since you're not supposed to ignore terrorist threats until after you become president.

  David Letterman

  President, Busy, Odd

• Have you folks been following the controversy with John Kerry and his service in Vietnam and the Swift Boat campaign? It all took place in Vietnam and now it just won't go away. I was thinking about this - if John Kerry had just ducked the war like everybody else he wouldn't have this trouble.

  David Letterman

  War, Thinking, Going Away

• President Bush says now he is sticking to his plan for handing over power to the Iraqis on June 30. It's also part of his plan to hand over power to John Kerry on January 20.

  David Letterman

  June, Hands, President

• John Kerry spent the day reading to preschoolers ... and the kids said Kerry actually lacked warmth and failed to articulate a clear message.

  David Letterman

  Reading, Kids, Messages

• According to the recent polls, Bush has a slight lead over John Kerry. So today, Bush hung a banner over the White House saying, 'Mission Accomplished.'

  David Letterman

  White, House, Today

• The campaign for the White House is heating up with John Kerry taking heat for throwing his Vietnam medals away, getting a $1000 haircut, and wearing a 1970s wig known as 'the Leno.' There are really two sides to this story. And America can't wait for Kerry to present both of them.

  David Letterman

  Two Sides, White, America

• Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages. I'm telling you this guy has more positions than Paris Hilton.

  David Letterman

  Change, Gay, Yesterday

• John Kerry says that foreign leaders want him to be president, but that he can't name the foreign leaders. That's all right, President Bush can't name them either.

  David Letterman

  Names, Leader, President

• John Kerry had surgery on his right shoulder this week to repair some damage. It was pretty bad, he had no feeling. It was almost like he was a Republican.

  David Letterman

  Feelings, Damage, Republican

• I'm worried about John Kerry, he's so confident now that he's already planning his White House sex scandal.

  David Letterman

  Sex, White, House

• John Kerry says the 'W' in George W. Bush stands for 'Wrong.' But he still can't explain what John Kerry stands for.

  David Letterman

  John Kerry, Stills

• Ted Kennedy is endorsing John Kerry and I'm wondering, do you really want the endorsement of a guy with a Bloody Mary mustache?

  David Letterman

  Guy, Mustache, Want

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