David Letterman Quotes About War

Quotes about: War

• Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today? 1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War. 2) Advising the President. 3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.

  David Letterman

  Funny, War, Humorous

  "Only Joking: What's So Funny about Making People Laugh?". Book by Jimmy Carr and Lucy Greeves, 2006.

• I want to tell you though, I'm having the absolute best birthday ever. Last night -- this was so sweet, it means a great deal
  to me -- the other cult members got together and they all took me out to see Star Wars.

  David Letterman

  Sweet, Stars, War

• Do you know who is ready to go with the presidential campaign? Jeb Bush. Jeb already has plans to end the war in Iraq that his brother started. All he needs is a hot tub time machine.

  David Letterman

  Brother, War, Iraq

• Have you folks been following the controversy with John Kerry and his service in Vietnam and the Swift Boat campaign? It all took place in Vietnam and now it just won't go away. I was thinking about this - if John Kerry had just ducked the war like everybody else he wouldn't have this trouble.

  David Letterman

  War, Thinking, Going Away

• President Bush announced that the war in Iraq has been won. It's all over, it's been won. I believe this would be Bush's first uncontested victory.

  David Letterman

  War, Believe, Iraq

• The Japanese Prime Minister has apologized for Japan's part in World War II. However, he still hasn't mentioned anything about karaoke.

  David Letterman

  War, Japan, World

• President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either.

  David Letterman

  War, Thinking, Appreciate

• Congratulations to Bill and Hillary Clinton: this weekend, 33rd wedding anniversary. How about that? And you thought the Iraqi war was a never-ending conflict.

  David Letterman

  Congratulations, War, Wedding Anniversary

• Gays are now allowed to serve openly in the military. So maybe our next war could be a musical.

  David Letterman

  Military, War, Gay

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