Steven Wright Quotes About Dogs

Quotes about: Dogs

• I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, Paranoid, Not Sure

• I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Dog, Silly

• I bought a dog the other day. . . . I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. . . . "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, Fun, Justice

• The other day, I was walking my dog around my building . . . on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, People, Ledges

• I got a dog and named him 'Stay'. Now, I go 'Come here, Stay!' After a while, the dog went insane and wouldn't move at all.

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Dog, Moving

• I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, Pet, Gone

• I don’t have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, My Dog, Walks

• I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles.

  Steven Wright

  Dog, Cat, Eye

• I took my dog for a walk... all the way from New York to Florida... I said to him "There now you're done."

  Steven Wright

  Dog, New York, Florida

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