Dave Barry Quotes About Literature

Quotes about: Literature

• It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Hilarious, Witty

  Dave Barry (2013). “My Teenage Son's Goal in Life Is to Make Me Feel 3,500 Years Old: and Other Thoughts on Parenting from Dave Barry”, p.100, Andrews McMeel Publishing

• We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

  Dave Barry

  Strong, Patriotic, Jail

  Dave Barry (1994). “The World According to Dave Barry”, Outlet

• The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

  Dave Barry

  Running, Religious, Writing

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.201, Ballantine Books

• My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible.

  Dave Barry

  Games, Chess Pieces, Literature

• Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

  Dave Barry

  Dance, Ballet Class, Dancing

  Dave Barry (1998). “Dave Barry Turns 50”, Crown

• If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

  Dave Barry

  Literature, Enough, Bigs

• Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.

  Dave Barry

  Oregon, Gdp, Literature

• Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.

  Dave Barry

  Witty, Powerful, Reality

  "How Do You Light a Fart?: And 150 Other Essential Things Every Guy Should Know about Science". Book by Bobby Mercer, 2009.

• Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically.

  Dave Barry

  Girly, Simple, Men

• Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you can repeat words! And they don't even have to be true!

  Dave Barry

  Jobs, Writing, Thinking

• We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.

  Dave Barry

  Objectivity, Literature, Littles

• Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.

  Dave Barry

  Technology, Men, Answers

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry in Cyberspace”, p.23, Ballantine Books

• Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.

  Dave Barry

  Nascar Racing, Literature, Upside Down

  Dave Barry (2009). “Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus”, p.104, Ballantine Books

• I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.

  Dave Barry

  Technology, Purpose, Use

• The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humor, Mean

• Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.

  Dave Barry

  Guy, Literature, Assuming

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys”, p.85, Ballantine Books

• For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.

  Dave Barry

  Golf, Balls, Literature

• I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories.

  Dave Barry

  Tv News, Personality, Stories

  Dave Barry (2011). “Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down”, p.188, Ballantine Books

• Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent?

  Dave Barry

  Sports, Trying, Literature

  Dave Barry (2009). “Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus”, p.88, Ballantine Books

• A gene can be either dominant or recessive, depending on which type of gene it is.

  Dave Barry

  Literature, Genes, Type

• What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another person, especially if he has had between four and seven beers.

  Dave Barry

  Depressing, Beer, Being Sad

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.1, Ballantine Books

• The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.

  Dave Barry

  Skills, People, Literature

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry Turns Forty”, p.124, Ballantine Books

• The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.

  Dave Barry

  Literature, Computer, Internet

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry in Cyberspace”, p.8, Ballantine Books

• Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.

  Dave Barry

  Snowboarding, People, Literature

  Dave Barry (2009). “Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus”, p.86, Ballantine Books

• The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

  Dave Barry

  Birthday, Sex, Eye

  Dave Barry (2009). “Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus”, p.146, Ballantine Books

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