Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win.
A woman in love can't be reasonable - or she probably wouldn't be in love.
Spring is nature's way of saying, 'Let's party!'
Assumptions are the termites of relationships.
The eyes of a dog, the expression of a dog, the warmly wagging tail of a dog and the gloriously cold damp nose of a dog were in my opinion all God-given for one purpose only-to make complete fools of us human beings.
All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
I can't tell you how much we laughed on the set to have Alec Guinness in a scene with a big, furry dog that's flying a space ship.
I've been to the Leaning Tower of Pisa. It's a tower, and it's leaning. You look at it, but nothing happens, so then you look for someplace to get a sandwich.
Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.
I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.
I don't know what's wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station. I actually bought a congressman.
Had be been Shakespeare, he would then have written Troilus and Cressidato brand the offending sex; but being only a little dog, he began to bite them.
A man bitten by a dog, whether the animal is mad or not, is apt to get mad himself.
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!
Polite conversation is rarely either.
I was like, what the hell is my life coming to? I'm a trained actor! I've done Shakespeare and here I am having farting contests with an imaginary dog!
Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes
On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.
You must lose everything in order to gain anything.
Sometimes the person who is the most logical is the person whom we call insane.
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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