Jokes Quotes - Page 34

• I think in my case, I had no choice but to have a good sense of humor. I grew up with my dad, Danny Thomas, and George Burns and Bob Hope and Milton Berle and Sid Caesar and all those guys were at our house all the time and telling jokes and making each other laugh.

  Marlo Thomas

  Dad, Thinking, Laughing

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• In my deepest parts of sadness, I'm always making a joke or being sarcastic.

  Lea Thompson

  Sarcastic, Sadness, Sarcastic Humor

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• Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy. He plays a lot of practical jokes.

  Ashley Tisdale

  Brother, Crazy, Play

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• My way of fitting in was through jokes and making people laugh.

  Carrot Top

  People, Laughing, Way

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• It's not a stereotype if it's always true.

  Daniel Tosh

  Funny, Humor, Stereotype

  Song: One, Album: Happy Thoughts, 2011

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• I often joke that I straddle psychosis and neurosis, and that being an artist keeps me in the middle, so I can work between the two.

  Sam Taylor-Wood

  Artist, Psychosis, Two

  "There's something about Sam" by Simon Hattenstone, www.theguardian.com. November 27, 2009.

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• In almost every interview someone asks what does HIM stand for. I can't even remember our latest lie about that. When Hanson was hot, we said it means Hanson Is Murder. The name doesn't have a particular history. His Infernal Majesty was a totally different band. I think HIM derives from some death metal joke.

  Ville Valo

  Lying, Mean, Thinking

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• What other culture could have produced someone like Hemmingway and not seen the joke?

  Gore Vidal

  Other Cultures, Culture, Literature

  "United States: Essays 1952-1992 (Edmund Wilson: This Critic and This Gin and These Shoes)". Book by Gore Vidal, May 18, 1993.

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• I sit in places like Costa Coffee in Banstead and write rubbish. I need a deadline. I think about the 44 tour dates and keep imagining standing in front of all these people. Then every day I write 15 jokes minimum.

  Tim Vine

  Coffee, Writing, Thinking

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• I'm sure we, the American people, are the butt of jokes by those in power.

  Alice Walker

  People

  Alice Walker (2013). “The Cushion in the Road: Meditation and Wandering as the Whole World Awakens to Being in Harm's Way”, p.15, New Press, The

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• I have an airplane hangar with 17 cars in it. That's no joke. I have a 'half pipe' in there, too - you know, like a big ramp, where I skateboard. It's awesome. It's the ultimate fantasy.

  Paul Walker

  Airplane, Car, Half

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• I don't think comedy is necessarily an attack. It's finding humour in life. I don't think if you're making a joke about something you're automatically demeaning it.

  David Walliams

  Thinking, Comedy, Humour

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• A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself.

  Jessamyn West

  Lost Love, Heart, Humor

  Jessamyn West (1957). “To see the dream”

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• But for me to have the opportunity to stand in front of a bunch of executives and present myself, I had to hustle in my own way. I can't tell you how frustrating it was that they didn't get that. No joke - I'd leave meetings crying all the time.

  Kanye West

  Opportunity, Hustle, Way

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• An audience who watches my shows knows who I am, knows that right when they think I'm going to make a joke, I'm going to blow something up, or during the worst peril, I'm going to have someone give someone a kiss - it's just going to happen.

  Joss Whedon

  Kissing, Blow, Thinking

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• I always enjoy conversation more if there is some substance to it - which is a just incredibly hilarious thing for me to say because for many, many years I was the guy whose only contribution to any conversation was, 'There was a funny 'Simpson's' joke about that.'

  Joss Whedon

  Years, Guy, Substance

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• You know, I always was an early morning or late night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning you make up some of your most absurd jokes.

  Joss Whedon

  Morning, Night, Four

  "Joss Whedon Talks THE CABIN IN THE WOODS, THE AVENGERS, His Writing Process, Comic-Con, Collecting and More". Interview with Steve Weintraub, collider.com. April 5, 2012.

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• The audience today has heard every joke. They know every plot. They know where you're going before you even start. That's a tough audience to surprise, and a tough audience to write for. It's much more competitive now, because the audience is so much more - I want to say sophisticated.

  Betty White

  Writing, Plot, Want

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Everybody I know is a joke writer.

  Ron White

  Knows

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• You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.

  Ron White

  Years, Twelve, Albums

  Interview with Guy MacPherson, www.guymacpherson.ca. October 24, 2006.

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• I have always noticed that deeply and truly religious persons are fond of a joke, and I am suspicious of those who aren't.

  Alfred North Whitehead

  Religious, Affection, Persons

  Church and Home (published by United Methodist Church, and Evangelical United Brethren Church), Volume 1, p. 21, 1964.

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• I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes.

  Rainn Wilson

  Terrible, Sitcom, Know How

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• What I like about the jokes, to me it's a lot of logic, no matter how crazy they are. It has to make absolute sense, or it won't be funny.

  Steven Wright

  Crazy, Matter, Logic

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• Good jokes are gems. A good idea is hard to come by. I couldn't give them to someone else, even for money. It just wouldn't seem right.

  Steven Wright

  Ideas, Giving, Gems

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• I don't get up, get dressed, go out, and think, 'Okay, I gotta find eight jokes.'

  Steven Wright

  Thinking, Eight, Get Up

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