Practical Joke Quotes

• The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Hilarious, Fools Day

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

  Rita Rudner

  Love, Funny, Life

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• It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.

  Rick Riordan

  Life, Humorous, Enjoy

  Rick Riordan (2009). “Percy Jackson and the Last Olympian”, p.37, Penguin UK

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• The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex. Men need to have sex to feel loved. How do we ever get started.

  Billy Connolly

  Sex, Men, Race

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• [The Outsiders] was very competitive, in the best possible way. Full of love, full of companionship and fellowship, pranks and practical jokes and ball-busting.

  Rob Lowe

  Fellowship, Way, Outsiders

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• Lying contains the same hostile elements as a practical joke in that the 'victim' ends up looking foolish in his own eyes and laughable in everyone else's.

  Sue Grafton

  Lying, Eye, Elements

  Sue Grafton (2010). “"O" is for Outlaw”, p.76, Macmillan

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• There are certain queer times and occasions in this strange mixed affair we call life when a man takes his whole universe for a vast practical joke.

  Herman Melville

  Men, Strange, Affair

  Herman Melville (1892). “Moby Dick”, p.216

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• I have never been able to see life as anything but a vast complicated practical joke, and it's better to laugh than cry.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Laughing, Able, Complicated

  "I Will Fear No Evil" by Robert A. Heinlein, Ace Books, (p. 442), 1987.

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• If you make people laugh or cry about little black marks on sheets of white paper, what is that but a practical joke? All the great story lines are great practical jokes that people fall for over and over again.

  Kurt Vonnegut

  Fall, White, People

  Kurt Vonnegut (2011). “Kurt Vonnegut: The Last Interview: And Other Conversations”, p.47, Melville House

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• In all the works on pedagogy that ever I read — and they have been many, big, and heavy — I don't remember that any one has advocated a system of teaching by practical jokes, mostly cruel. That, however, describes the method of our great teacher, Experience.

  Charles Sanders Peirce

  Teacher, Teaching, Remember

  Charles Sanders Peirce, Patricia Ann Turrisi (1997). “Pragmatism as a Principle and Method of Right Thinking: The 1903 Harvard Lectures on Pragmatism”, p.160, SUNY Press

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• I'm terrible at practical jokes. I do them too well, so they're not funny. I end up saying, "Oh, no, I'm joking, I'm joking."

  Anna Torv

  Ends, Terrible, Wells

  "Anna Torv Is a Woman We Love" by Cal Fussman, www.esquire.com. February 8, 2010.

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• I never really was much of a practical jokester or anything.

  Kristanna Loken

  Practicals

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• Life seemed to be an educator's practical joke in which you spent the first half learning and the second half learning that everything you learned in the first half was wrong.

  Russell Baker

  Half, Firsts, Educator

  Russell Baker (1991). “There's a Country in My Cellar”, Avon Books

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• I certainly had qualms about writing my piece in the first place, since I knew I couldn't express my disdain for many of Rev. Falwell's teachings. But I don't regret having written about the sides of Rev. Falwell that had nothing to do with politics or religion - his grandkids, his ministry for ex-alcoholics, his penchant for practical jokes. I think it's important to recognize the humanity in everyone, even those we strongly disagree with.

  Kevin Roose

  Regret, Teaching, Writing

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• I always thought my genitals were the result of some crude practical joke.

  Steven Morrissey

  Memorable, Results, Crude

  "Papal attraction" by Douglas Coupland, www.theguardian.com. March 19, 2006.

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• I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work.

  Colin Mochrie

  Lines, Individualism, Practicals

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• Nobody was perfect. Not even close. And everybody had wrinkles from smiling and squinting and craining their necks. Everybody has marks on their bodies from years of living- a trail of life left on them. Evidence of all the adventures and sleepless nights and practical jokes and heartbreaks that had made them who they are.

  Katherine Center

  Smile, Heartbreak, Adventure

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• Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Cooking, Sauce, Sin

  P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “The Bachelor Home Companion: A Practical Guide to Keeping House Like a Pig”, p.57, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

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• Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy. He plays a lot of practical jokes.

  Ashley Tisdale

  Brother, Crazy, Play

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• Percy, meet Gladiola. Gladiola, Percy." I stared at Annabeth, figuring she'd crack up at this practical joke they were playing on me, but she looked deadly serious. "I'm not saying hello to a pink poodle," I said. "Forget it." "Percy," Annabeth said. "I said hello to the poodle. You say hello to the poodle." The poodle growled. "I said hello to the poodle.

  Rick Riordan

  Cracks, Annabeth, Poodles

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• Elvis was, at least the times I was around him, Elvis was a practical joker. He was always, had some little mischievous something going.

  Jackie DeShannon

  Redneck, Littles, Mischievous

  Interview with David Adams, www.elvis.com.au. August 2, 2015.

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• I had a healthy curiosity and would try things on - play lots of practical jokes. But it was more in my head - fantasies of "What would happen if...? Like what would happen in class if you took all your clothes off and you ran around the room?

  Andy Griffiths

  Class, Play, Clothes

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• What a vast fraternity it is,--that of 'Hearts that Ache.' For the last three months it has seemed to me as though all society were coming to me, to drop its mask for a moment and initiate me into the mystery. How we do suffer! And we go on laughing; for, as a practical joke at our expense, life is a success.

  Henry Adams

  Heart, Grieving, Laughing

  Henry Adams, Jacob Claver Levenson, Massachusetts Historical Society (1982). “The Letters of Henry Adams: 1886-1892”

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• When you have a couple hundred people in one huge space, that's gonna lead to jokes and it's a breeding ground for practical jokes and teasing.

  Duffy

  Couple, Space, People

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• All the great story lines are great practical jokes that people fall for over and over again.

  Kurt Vonnegut

  Fall, People, Stories

  Kurt Vonnegut (2011). “Kurt Vonnegut: The Last Interview: And Other Conversations”, p.47, Melville House

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