W. C. Fields Quotes About Water

Quotes about: Water

• Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.

  W. C. Fields

  Travel, Book, Drinking

• Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

  W. C. Fields

  Food, Drinking, Beer

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

• I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Witty, Hunting

• I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Humor, Water

• I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?

  W. C. Fields

  Food, Water, Way

• You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.

  W. C. Fields

  Trust, Water, Alcohol

• My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.

  W. C. Fields

  Ambition, Orange Trees, Glasses

• We frequently hear of people dying from too much drinking. That this happens is a matter of record. But the blame is always placed on whisky. Why this should be I never could understand. You can die from drinking too much of anything - coffee, water, milk, soft drinks and all such stuff as that. And so as long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing. I will make mine whisky.

  W. C. Fields

  Drinking, Coffee, Simple

  W. C. Fields (2016). “W.C. Fields by Himself: His Intended Autobiography with Hitherto Unpublished Letters, Notes, Scripts, and Articles”, p.152, Rowman & Littlefield

• Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.

  W. C. Fields

  Water, Say Anything, Drink

• During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.

  W. C. Fields

  Drinking, Wine, Water

• The funniest thing about comedy is that you never know why people laugh. I know what makes them laugh but trying to get your hands on the why of it is like trying to pick an eel out of a tub of water.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Humor, Hands

• I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.

  W. C. Fields

  Beer, Water, Alcohol

• Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.

  W. C. Fields

  Scotch, Water, Needs

• I never drink water... fish f**k in it.

  W. C. Fields

  Drinking, Water, Fishes

• What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake which emitted a curious ticking noise? Would you plunge it into a pail of water - thus insulting Soviet cuisine in general?

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Beautiful, Humorous

  W.C. Fields (2016). “Fields for President”, p.63, Rowman & Littlefield

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