That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk.
That's all drugs and alcohol do, they cut off your emotions in the end.
I drink to make other people more interesting.
I'm too drunk to recall much of what I've said. Which, come to think of it, is probably just as well, judging by the way people who are normally quite sensible dissolve into gibbering, rude, opinionated and bombastic idiots once the alcohol molecules in their bloom-stream outnumber the neutrons, or whatever. Luckily, one only notices this if one stays sober oneself, so the solution is as pleasant (at the time, at least) as it is obvious.
When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.
Trying to describe the process of becoming an alcoholic is like trying to describe air. It's too big and mysterious and pervasive to be defined. Alcohol is everywhere in your life, omnipresent, and you're both aware and unaware of it almost all the time, all you know is you'd die without it, and there is no simple reason why this happens, no single moment, no physiological event that pushes a heavy drinker across a concrete line into alcoholism. It's a slow, gradual, insidious, elusive becoming.
Two great European narcotics, alcohol and Christianity.
I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.
I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.
God invented whiskey to keep the Irish from ruling the world.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer.
I began to think vodka was my drink at last. It didn’t taste like anything, but it went straight down into my stomach like a sword swallowers’ sword and made me feel powerful and godlike.
People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim.
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism.
The chief reason for drinking is the desire to behave in a certain way, and to be able to blame it on alcohol.
Wine hath drowned more men than the sea.
I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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