Mark Twain Quotes About Taxes

• The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.

  Mark Twain

  Business, Inspiration, Humor

• What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Money, Differences

  Notebook, Dec. 1902

• I don't know of a single foreign product that enters this country untaxed, except the answer to prayer.

  Mark Twain

  Country, Prayer, Taxation

  Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.467, Courier Corporation

• A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Fine, Taxes

• I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes.

  Mark Twain

  House, Taxes, Profanity

  Mark Twain, Milton Meltzer (2002). “Mark Twain Himself: A Pictorial Biography”, p.127, University of Missouri Press

• [I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.

  Mark Twain

  House, Speak, Unchristian

  Mark Twain (1992). “Mark Twain's Letters, Volume 3: 1869”, p.471, Univ of California Press

• The only certainties in life are death and taxes.

  Mark Twain

  Certainty Of Death, Certainty In Life, Taxes

• I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them.

  Mark Twain

  People, Friendly, Criminals

  Taxes and Morals, delivered 22 January 1906, New York

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