Mark Twain Quotes About Lawyers

• A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch.

  Mark Twain

  Clever, Law, Lunch

• Heaven knows insanity was disreputable enough, long ago; but now that the lawyers have got to cutting every gallows rope and picking every prison lock with it, it is become a sneaking villainy that ought to hang and keep on hanging its sudden possessors until evil-doers should conclude that the safest plan was to never claim to have it until they came by it legitimately. The very calibre of the people the lawyers most frequently try to save by the insanity subterfuge ought to laugh the plea out of the courts, one would think.

  Mark Twain

  Cutting, Thinking, Long Ago

• A reputable lawyer will advise you to keep out of the law, make the best of a foolish bargain, and not get caught again.

  Mark Twain

  Law, Foolish, Caught

  Mark Twain, Hamlin Lewis Hill (1967). “Mark Twain's Letters to His Publishers, 1867-1894”, p.86, Univ of California Press

• To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Humorous, Law

  Following the Equator ch. 37, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar" (1897)

• The law is a system that protects everybody who can afford to hire a good lawyer.

  Mark Twain

  Law, Lawyer, Protect

• They all laid their heads together like as many lawyers when they are gettin' ready to prove that a man's heirs ain't got any right to his property.

  Mark Twain

  Men, Together, Heirs

  Mark Twain, Peter Kaminsky (2009). “The Chicago of Europe, and Other Tales of Foreign Travel”, p.12, Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.

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