Mark Twain Quotes About Pets

• 

  The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.

  Mark Twain

  Dog, Men, Animal

  Mark Twain, William Dean Howells (1960). “Mark Twain-Howells Letters: The Correspondence of Samuel L. Clemens and William D. Howells, 1872-1910”, Belknap Press

• If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Inspiring, Thankful

  Pudd'nhead Wilson ch. 16, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" (1894)
• 

  If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.

  Mark Twain

  Dog, Cat, Animal

• The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.

  Mark Twain

  Love, Inspirational, Life
• 

  Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Cute, God

  Mark Twain (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Mark Twain (Illustrated)”, p.9262, Delphi Classics

• Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Humor, Cat

• Man is a marvelous curiosity...he thinks he is the Creator's pet...he even believes the Creator loves him; has passion for him; sits up nights to admire him; yes and watch over him and keep him out of trouble. He prays to him and thinks he listens. Isn't it a quaint idea.

  Mark Twain

  Religious, Believe, Passion

• I am not interested to know whether vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn't...The pain which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity toward it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further.

  Mark Twain

  Pain, Animal, Vegetarianism

• It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.

  Mark Twain

  Nature, Animal, Men

  Mark Twain (2009). “Mark Twain’s Book of Animals”, p.304, Univ of California Press

• Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it.

  Mark Twain

  Life, Pain, Animal

  Mark Twain (1973). “What Is Man? and Other Philosophical Writings”, p.84, Univ of California Press

• A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Life, Education

• If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.

  Mark Twain

  Inspiration, Cat, Men

  Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.39, Courier Corporation

• Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain at one end you lose at the other. It's like feeding a dog on his own tail. It won't fatten the dog.

  Mark Twain

  Education, Dog, School

  Mark Twain (2016). “The Wit and Wisdom of Mark Twain”, p.46, Chartwell

• If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.

  Mark Twain

  Nature, Inspiration, Learning

• It is the Creator´s Grand Army, and he is the Commander-in-Chief... With these facts before you, now try to guess man´s chiefest pet name for this ferocious Commander-in-Chief? I will save you the trouble but you must not laugh. It is Our Father in Heaven.

  Mark Twain

  Father, Army, Men

• Whenever he was out of luck and a little down-hearted, he would fall to mourning over the loss of a wonderful cat he used to own (for where women and children are not, men of kindly impulses take up with pets, for they must love something)

  Mark Twain

  Children, Fall, Cat

  Mark Twain (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Mark Twain (Illustrated)”, p.3504, Delphi Classics

You May Also Like:

Charles Dickens

Ernest Hemingway

Oscar Wilde

Edgar Allan Poe

Jack London

Hal Holbrook

William Faulkner