Sarcastic Quotes - Page 15

• He never bore a grudge against anyone he wronged.

  Simone Signoret

  Personality, Grudge, Bores

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• German in the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747.

  Willie Rushton

  Sick, Ugly, Sound

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• There but for the grace of God, goes God.

  Winston Churchill

  Grace, Insult, Sleazes

  Sir Winston Churchill (1965). “The Churchill Wit”

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• The finest woman that ever walked the streets.

  Mae West

  Finest, Streets

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• I got into therapy in the fifth grade because I said in a sarcastic way that I was going to kill myself, and they didn't get it then. Nothing's changed.

  Fiona Apple

  Way, Fifth Grade, Said

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• Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.

  Alfred Hitchcock

  Funny, Death, Work

  Alfred Hitchcock, Sidney Gottlieb (1997). “Hitchcock on Hitchcock: Selected Writings and Interviews”, p.58, Univ of California Press

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• I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress.

  Ronald Reagan

  Funny, Running, Wisdom

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• Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions.

  Frank Lloyd Wright

  Money, Sarcasm, People

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• I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.

  Woody Allen

  Inspirational, Funny, Death

  Quoted in Eric Lax, Woody Allen and His Comedy (1975)

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• A four-hundred-dollar suit on him would look like socks on a rooster.

  Earl Long

  Roosters, Dollars, Looks

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• He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

  Molly Ivins

  Eye, Keyholes, Narrow-minded

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• He thinks by infection, catching an opinion like a cold.

  John Ruskin

  Thinking, Opinion, Cold

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• She's descended from a long line her mother listened to.

  Gypsy Rose Lee

  Mother, Long, Lines

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• Sarcasm is weird. Even not in acting, in life I feel 'sarcastic' is a word that people use to describe me sometimes so when I meet someone, it's almost they feel they have to also be sarcastic, but it can sometimes just come off as mean if it's not used in the right way.

  Aubrey Plaza

  Mean, Sarcasm, People

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• He's so fat, he can be his own running mate.

  Johnny Carson

  Running, Obesity, Fats

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• I see her as one great stampede of lips directed at the nearest derriere.

  Noel Coward

  Lips, Stampede

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• The gods too are fond of a joke.

  Aristotle

  Inspirational, Life, God

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• It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Cuddling, Turkeys

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• I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

  John Cleese

  Business, Sarcasm, Hatred

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• She resembles the Venus de Milo: she is very old, has no teeth, and has white spots on her yellow skin.

  Heinrich Heine

  Venus De Milo, Yellow, White

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• His face is livid, gaunt his whole body, his breath is green with gall; his tongue drips poison.

  John Quincy Adams

  Poison, Body, Green

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• A woman's preaching is like a dog's walking on his hinter legs. It is not done well; but you are surprised to see it done at all.

  James Boswell

  Dog, Done, Legs

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• I have friends who are so sarcastic, but I never view it as mean.

  Kat Dennings

  Mean, Views

  "Kat Dennings Talks 2 BROKE GIRLS, RENEE and the THOR Sequel". Interview with Christina Radish, collider.com. September 14, 2011.

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• His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere.

  Mark Twain

  Ignorance, Intelligence, World

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• He was so narrow minded that if he fell on a pin it would blind him in both eyes.

  Fred Allen

  Eye, Blind, Pins

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