Sarcastic Quotes - Page 18

• In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.

  Mark Twain

  Jobs, Real, World

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• If you can find something everyone agrees on, it's wrong.

  Mo Udall

  Sarcasm, Vaccines, Conflict

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• I played a lot of sarcastic, wisecracking characters for a long time, and people would think that was me. And it's very much not me, and then people would think I was being sarcastic when I wasn't: 'Oh, you're making fun of me right now.' And I wasn't!

  Zooey Deschanel

  Fun, Character, Thinking

  "Interview: ‘New Girl’ star Zooey Deschanel" by Alan Sepinwall, uproxx.com. September 02, 2011.

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• Colombian humor is very black, very sarcastic.

  Barbet Schroeder

  Humor, Black, Very Sarcastic

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• My son Cooper has just turned ten and the sarcasm fairy has already started to take up residence inside his body. Not only am I living with my mother - again! - but I've also got her mini-me to contend with.

  Melissa Rivers

  Mother, Sarcasm, Son

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• I'm very bubbly, so when people meet me, they sometimes think I'm fake. I'm excited to meet new people, but I guess I sound I'm being sarcastic.

  Lyndsy Fonseca

  Thinking, People, Fake

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• I didn't respond to the kind of sarcastic tone. It felt like some of the Sarah Palin speech was written as though it were a Saturday Night Live newscast. Maybe that's because she looks very similar . . . She's got her Tina Fey thing going.

  Eddie Vedder

  Night, Kind, Palin

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• I'm sketching ideas. They're a completely different way of working than working with editors at a magazine where you're always working with permission; approval. I'm willing to make a gentle separation. I still need to do that work since I enjoy it. It gives me access to a lot of energy in life and culture. But also, there's a part of me that is dark, sarcastic, funny. Unpredictable, even naughty.

  Max Vadukul

  Dark, Naughty, Giving

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• That I walk around calling people 'dummy' and 'hockey puck'. I do have a different life apart from being sarcastic on stage. I might kibitz around with my friends, but I'm nothing like the person who does stand up. Nothing like that.

  Don Rickles

  Hockey, People, Puck

  Source: glamorosi.blogspot.com

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• Prior to Valentinus, those who follow Valentinus had no existence. Nor did those from Marcion exist before Marcion. Nor, in short, did any of those malignant-minded people, whom I have listed above, have any existence previous to the initiators and inventors of their perversity.

  Irenaeus of Lyons

  People, Existence, Inventor

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• A house is never still in darkness to those who listen intently; there is a whispering in distant chambers, an unearthly hand presses the snib of the window, the latch rises. Ghosts were created when the first man awoke in the night.

  James M. Barrie

  Halloween, Night, Men

  James M. Barrie (2013). “The Little Minister (Illustrated Edition)”, p.201, Jazzybee Verlag

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• Research is an organized method for keeping you reasonably dissatisfied with what you have.

  Charles Kettering

  Funny, Sarcasm, Science

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• Everything is worth precisely as much as a belch, the difference being that a belch is more satisfying.

  Ingmar Bergman

  Sarcasm, Differences, Satisfying

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Avoid sarcasm. Don't insist on the last word.

  Ford Frick

  Sarcasm, Lasts, Last Words

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• Sarcastic Science, she would like to know,
  In her complacent ministry of fear,
  How we propose to get away from here
  When she has made things so we have to go
  Or be wiped out. Will she be asked to show
  Us how by rocket we may hope to steer
  To some star off there, say, a half light-year
  Through temperature of absolute zero?
  Why wait for Science to supply the how
  When any amateur can tell it now?
  The way to go away should be the same
  As fifty million years ago we came-
  If anyone remembers how that was
  I have a theory, but it hardly does.

  Robert Frost

  Stars, Zero, Science

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• That was a sarcastic remark pointing out that Bill Clinton has, quite a past, and Hillary Clinton has done quite a job on attacking the people who were victims of Bill Clinton.

  Rudy Giuliani

  Jobs, Past, People

  Source: www.washingtonpost.com

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• And now I'm using sarcasm, to confess the whole thing so later I could say I already told you.

  Homer

  Sarcasm, Whole

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• Being the offspring of English teachers is a mixed blessing. When the film star says to you, on the air, 'It was a perfect script for she and I,' inside your head you hear, in the sarcastic voice of your late father, 'Perfect for she, eh? And perfect for I, also?'

  Dick Cavett

  Teacher, Stars, Father

  Dick Cavett (2010). “Talk Show: Confrontations, Pointed Commentary, and Off-Screen Secrets”, p.12, Macmillan

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• Barack Obama is pretty similar to the person you see in public, at press conferences. He's a little saltier, a little more sarcastic and cutting.

  Jonathan Chait

  Cutting, Littles, Conferences

  Source: www.macleans.ca

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• Chick flick is not a term used to praise a movie. Nobody says 'it's a great chick flick.' It's a way of being derisive. I'm not clear why it's ok to do it.

  Callie Khouri

  Way, Praise, Chicks

  "Interview with Callie Khouri, Director of Mad Money". Interview with Melissa Silverstein, www.huffingtonpost.com. January 17, 2008.

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• My brothers are both 6 ft. 5 in., and if you have younger brothers who are bigger than you then you have to learn the ancient martial art of sarcasm.

  Nick Moran

  Brother, Art, Sarcasm

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

  Joey Lauren Adams

  Funny, Sex, Wife

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• I've learned that I need to spell out, even in cases seemingly so blatant, that in fact I am not taking this at face value and am being 'sarcastic.

  James Fallows

  Needs, Faces, Facts

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• Living under capitalism, I like learning to feel comfortable with activity that does not result in success — since non-success is the norm. Trying your best and making it is not the norm — it’s propaganda. Of course I play with notions of hype, too... The entire Comatonse website is a sarcastic hype-engine, sprawling forever, overwhelming the viewer with nothingness.

  Terre Thaemlitz

  Play, Hype, Forever

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• If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English.

  Wilfrid Sheed

  Sarcasm, Intelligent, Speak English

  Wilfrid Sheed (1990). “Essays in Disguise”, Alfred A. Knopf

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