Chelsea Handler Quotes About Dating

Quotes about: Dating

• Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.

  Chelsea Handler

  Funny, Humor, Sleep

• I had to feign interest in all this nonsense until I could ask when I could come over and sit on his face. I didn't say that out loud, of course. I never say the things I really want to. If I did, I'd have no friends.

  Chelsea Handler

  Funny, Humor, Dating

  Chelsea Handler (2005). “My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands”, p.63, Bloomsbury Publishing USA

• When I don't know what to do, I just open my mouth. Why won't anyone date me?

  Chelsea Handler

  Dating, Mouths, Knows

• My theory about Taylor Swift is that she's a virgin, that everyone breaks up with her because they date her for two weeks and she's like, 'I'm not gonna do it'.

  Chelsea Handler

  Two, Dating, Week

  "Chelsea Handler Mocks Taylor Swift: Talk Show Host Jokes Singer Is A Virgin On ‘Watch What Happens Live’". www.huffingtonpost.com. March 7, 2013.

• According to the New York Post, Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen are dating. They must be getting serious - Lance gave Ashley his yellow Live Strong bracelet. She wears it as a belt.

  Chelsea Handler

  Strong, New York, Yellow

• The only thing worse than dating a single mom is dating a single mom that won't put out.

  Chelsea Handler

  Mom, Single Mom, Dating

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