Sarcastic Quotes - Page 2

• Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.

  Oscar Wilde

  Love, Friendship, Passion

  Oscar Wilde (2014). “The Importance of Being Earnest and Other Plays”, p.139, Simon and Schuster

  198 Copy quote

  Show source

• What is art? Prostitution.

  Charles Baudelaire

  Art, Prostitution

  Charles Baudelaire, Christopher Isherwood, W. H. Auden (2006). “Intimate Journals”, p.31, Courier Corporation

  11 Copy quote

  Show source
• 

  Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  2625 Copy quote

• In Russia a man is called reactionary if he objects to having his property stolen and his wife and children murdered.

  Winston Churchill

  Children, Men, Russia

  Winston Churchill (1987). “The Irrepressible Churchill: Stories, Sayings and Impressions of Sir Winston Churchill”, London : Robson Books

  9 Copy quote

  Show source

• Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Hilarious, Witty

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  58 Copy quote

  Show source

• You take the lies out of him, and he'll shrink to the size of your hat; you take the malice out of him, and he'll disappear.

  Mark Twain

  Lying, Hats, Size

  Mark Twain (2016). “Life On The Mississippi”, p.152, Tyché

  15 Copy quote

  Show source

• I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

  Groucho Marx

  Inspirational, Funny, Smile

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  113 Copy quote

  Show source

• My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I'm right.

  Ashleigh Brilliant

  Funny, Humble, Humor

  43 Copy quote

• A pessimist is a man who has been compelled to live with an optimist.

  Elbert Hubbard

  Funny, Optimistic, Humility

  "The Note Book of Elbert Hubbard". Book by Elbert Hubbard, 1927.

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

  Helen Rowland

  Funny Women, Excitement, Life Is

  71 Copy quote

• You're a mouse studying to be a rat.

  Wilson Mizner

  Rats, Study, Mice

  Quoted in Alva Johnston, The Legendary Mizners (1953)

  11 Copy quote

  Show source

• To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target

  Ashleigh Brilliant

  Funny, Life, Hilarious

  131 Copy quote

• Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Cute

  76 Copy quote

• Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.

  Oscar Wilde

  Love, Inspirational, Funny

  Oscar Wilde (1947). “The Happy Prince”, p.16, New Line Publishing

  135 Copy quote

  Show source

• Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

  H. L. Mencken

  Love, Funny, Marriage

  80 Copy quote

• I can resist everything except temptation.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Witty, Good Life

  Lady Windermere's Fan act 1 (1892) See Balzac 1; Clementina Graham 1; Mae West 19; Wilde 25

  83 Copy quote

  Show source

• A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Life, Clever

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  113 Copy quote

  Show source
• 

  When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. I'm beginning to believe it.

  Clarence Darrow

  Funny, Believe, Sarcasm

  Quoted in Irving Stone, Clarence Darrow for the Defense (1941)

  1443 Copy quote

  Show source

• Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it.

  Henny Youngman

  Years, Two, People

  31 Copy quote

• He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

  Joseph Heller

  Hygiene, Literature, Enjoy

  Joseph Heller (1999). “Catch-22: A Novel”, p.73, Simon and Schuster

  10 Copy quote

  Show source
• 

  Don't be humble... you're not that great.

  Golda Meir

  Humble, Humility, Sarcasm

  Quoted in N.Y. Times, 18 Mar. 1969

  118 Copy quote

  Show source

• Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others.

  Winston Churchill

  Time, Memories, Bad Day

  Sir Winston Churchill (1954). “Sir Winston Churchill: a self-portrait”

  16 Copy quote

  Show source

• I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

  Fred Allen

  Funny, Humorous, Anger

  69 Copy quote

• Science can never solve one problem without raising ten more problems.

  George Bernard Shaw

  Science, Creating, Problem

  "Einstein on Cosmic Religion and Other Opinions and Aphorisms".

  46 Copy quote

  Show source

• The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Life, Sarcasm

  Oscar Wilde, General Press (2016). “The Complete Works of Oscar Wilde: Novel, Short Stories, Poetry, Essays and Plays”, p.810, GENERAL PRESS

  13 Copy quote

  Show source