Wilson Mizner Quotes

Quotes about:

• Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.

  Wilson Mizner

  Inspirational, Success, Graduation

  Quoted in Evan Esar, The Dictionary of Humorous Quotations (1949). Colonel Tom Parker, Elvis Presley's manager, is said to have remarked, "You don't have to be nice to people you meet on the way up if you're not coming back down again."

  166 Copy quote

• If you steal from one author it's plagiarism; if you steal from many it's research.

  Wilson Mizner

  Inspirational, Funny, Hilarious

  Quoted in Bennett Cerf, Try and Stop Me: A Collection of Anecdotes and Stories, Mostly Humorous (1944). Although this is usually credited to Mizner, the Los Angeles Times, 17 Mar. 1941, quotes Bob Oliver: "If you steal from one man, it's plagiarism. If you steal from several, it's research."

  109 Copy quote

• Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

  Wilson Mizner

  Humility, Humble, Carpe Diem

  35 Copy quote

• The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.

  Wilson Mizner

  Anger, People, Ill Tempered

  Evanell K. Powell Brant, Addison Mizner, Wilson Mizner (1979*). “Debauched Proverbs and Other Miznerisms of Addison Mizner and Wilson Mizner”

  65 Copy quote

• The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.

  Wilson Mizner

  Water, Tears, World

  17 Copy quote

• The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.

  Wilson Mizner

  Time, Sleep, Insomnia

  18 Copy quote

• A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.

  Wilson Mizner

  Relationship, Positive, Success

  Quoted in Evan Esar, The Dictionary of Humorous Quotations (1949)

  83 Copy quote

• I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

  Wilson Mizner

  Laughter, Laughing, Judging

  Evanell K. Powell Brant, Addison Mizner, Wilson Mizner (1979*). “Debauched Proverbs and Other Miznerisms of Addison Mizner and Wilson Mizner”

  14 Copy quote

• To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.

  Wilson Mizner

  Wisdom, Giving, Advice

  14 Copy quote

• I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.

  Wilson Mizner

  Faith, Education, Teacher

  Quoted in Edward Dean Sullivan, The Fabulous Wilson Mizner (1935)

  13 Copy quote

• I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.

  Wilson Mizner

  Learning, People, Experience

  Evanell K. Powell Brant, Addison Mizner, Wilson Mizner (1979*). “Debauched Proverbs and Other Miznerisms of Addison Mizner and Wilson Mizner”

  14 Copy quote

• Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.

  Wilson Mizner

  Gambling, Gambling And Love, Way

  45 Copy quote

• A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.

  Wilson Mizner

  Ambition, Men, People

  15 Copy quote

• Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

  Wilson Mizner

  Achievement, Desire, Looks

  14 Copy quote

• Easy street is a blind alley.

  Wilson Mizner

  Ease, Blind, Easy

  7 Copy quote

• The first hundred years are the hardest.

  Wilson Mizner

  Birthday, Years, Firsts

  "Dreamers, Schemers and Scalawags". Book by Stuart B. McIver, 1994.

  20 Copy quote

• In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch; Tact is the clever footwork.

  Wilson Mizner

  Clever, Battle, Talent

  35 Copy quote

• I never saw a mob rush across town to do a good deed.

  Wilson Mizner

  Deeds, Saws, Towns

  Quoted in John Burke, Rogue's Progress: The Fabulous Adventures of Wilson Mizner (1975)

  6 Copy quote

• Women can instantly see through each other, and it's surprising how little they observe that's pleasant.

  Wilson Mizner

  Littles, Pleasant, Surprising

  5 Copy quote

• The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

  Wilson Mizner

  Funny, Friendship, Humor

  20 Copy quote

• I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.

  Wilson Mizner

  Hate, Believe, Effort

  16 Copy quote

• A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

  Wilson Mizner

  Drama, Criticism, Theatre

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  66 Copy quote

• There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.

  Wilson Mizner

  Skeletons, Restless, Closets

  13 Copy quote

• To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

  Wilson Mizner

  Bed, Embarrassment, Born

  Evanell K. Powell Brant, Addison Mizner, Wilson Mizner (1979*). “Debauched Proverbs and Other Miznerisms of Addison Mizner and Wilson Mizner”

  11 Copy quote

• Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you

  Wilson Mizner

  Substance, World, Citizens

  10 Copy quote

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