Ass Quotes - Page 37

• The key point about a demonstration is that it must be seen. Hence the term "demonstration." If a person demonstrates privately in his own home, this is not technically a demonstration but merely "acting silly" or "behaving like an ass.

  Woody Allen

  Silly, Home, Keys

  Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

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• There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless. Observe the ass, for instance: his character is about perfect, he is the choicest spirit among all the humbler animals, yet see what ridicule has brought him to. Instead of feeling complimented when we are called an ass, we are left in doubt.

  Mark Twain

  Character, Animal, Perfect

  Pudd'nhead Wilson "A Whisper to the Reader," "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" (1894)

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• The inquiry in England is not whether a man has talents and genius, but whether he is passive and polite and a virtuous ass and obedient to noblemen's opinions in art and science. If he is, he is a good man. If not, he must be starved.

  William Blake

  Respect, Art, Men

  William Blake (1988). “William Blake”, Oxford University Press, USA

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• I've signed dicks, asses, parole cards, a colostomy bag while it was still pumping. A couple of years ago, I signed a bloody Tampax. That's one you don't forget. I'm not asking for someone to top that!

  John Waters

  Couple, Years, Bags

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• I had rather ride on an ass that carries me than a horse that throws me.

  George Herbert

  Horse, Carrie, Practicality

  George Herbert, Christopher Harvey, George Gilfillan (1857). “The poetical works of George Herbert”, p.300

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• Intellect in its effort to explain Love got stuck in the mud like an ass. Love alone could explain love and loving.

  Rumi

  Love, Effort, Mud

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• And don't think that by eating freedom fries you are being patriotic and helping the war effort. Use less gasoline, read a newspaper. You know what, how about we cool it with the freedom fries anyway you fat asses. We're the fattest country in the world. Have you ever walked around an American mall? It's nothing but chick fillets and Lane Bryant track suits busting at the seams.

  Tina Fey

  Country, War, Patriotic

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• Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.

  Dorothy Parker

  Art, Writing, Kick Ass

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• We be tight like frogs ass.

  The Notorious B.I.G.

  Friendship, Frogs

  Song: Would You Die For Me, Album: Born Again, 1999

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• If you could use your brain like you use your ass.

  Alice Cooper

  Friendship, Brain, Use

  Song: Remarkably Insincere, Album: Zipper Catches Skin, 1982

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• There's love and there's romantic love. The Greeks had different words for different kinds of love. And we just got "love." I don't know what you would call the other kinds - maybe brotherly love, Christian love, the love of Saint Francis, love of everyone and everything. Then there's romantic love, which, by and large, is a pain in the ass, a kind of trauma.

  John Maus

  Christian, Pain, Romantic Love

  Interview with Jenn Pelly, pitchfork.com. August 10, 2012.

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• [Voicing a cartoon] feels like going down a mysterious but joyful black hole. Once you relax for 15 or 20 minutes, and really go, "I don't care if I look like an ass," it's really fun to see what happens. You know that nothing is being visually judged.

  Jim Parsons

  Fun, Black, Relax

  Source: collider.com

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• I'm a facist about spoilers. I'm the biggest pain in the ass to the marketing and promotions department. If I had my way, the commercials would be 30 seconds of black with a few words on them.

  Brian Austin Green

  Pain, Black, Marketing

  Source: www.movieweb.com

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• You can't deny that religion has done some good. It organizes lots of anti-poverty programs and soup kitchens and missionary work. But I would say that, first of all, all those things can be accomplished without religion. You can be ethical, somebody who does the right thing without feeling that he has to in order to get his ass saved in the next life.

  Bill Maher

  Soup Kitchens, Order, Feelings

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• Can an ass be tragic?--To perish under a burden that one can neither bear nor cast off? The case of the philosopher.

  Friedrich Nietzsche

  Philosophical, Bears, Philosopher

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• Do not be inaccessible. None is so perfect that he does not need at times the advice of others. He is an incorrigible ass who will never listen to any one. Even the most surpassing intellect should find a place for friendly counsel. Sovereignty itself must learn to lean. There are some that are incorrigible simply because they are inaccessible: They fall to ruin because none dares to extricate them. The highest should have the door open for friendship; it may prove the gate of help. A friend must be free to advise, and even to upbraid, without feeling embarrassed.

  Baltasar Gracian

  Fall, Should Have, Doors

  Baltasar Gracian (2006). “The Art of Worldly Wisdom”, p.59, Shambhala Publications

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• What are you gonna do for a face when the baboon wants his ass back?

  Abraham Lincoln

  Success, Want, Faces

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• Beauty and virtue: the most kissable ass in the world is no guarantee of good intentions.

  Mason Cooley

  Beauty, Guarantees, World

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• For often at Church I've seen the stained high glass
  Pour out the Virgin and Saints, twist and untwist
  The mortal youth of Christ astride an ass.

  Allen Tate

  Glasses, Church, Twists

  Allen Tate (2014). “Collected Poems, 1919-1976”, p.28, Macmillan

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• Of Ickworth's boys, their father's joys,
  There is but one a bad one;
  The tenth is he, the parson's fee,
  And indeed he is a sad one.
  No love of fame, no sense of shame,
  And a bad heart, let me tell ye:
  Without, all brass; within, all ass,
  And the puppy's name is Felly.

  Horace Walpole

  Father, Heart, Boys

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• Everytime I say "sure" when I mean "no," everytime I smile brightly when I'm exploding with rage, every time I imagine my man's achievement is my own, I know the cheerleader never really died. I feel her shaking her ass inside me and I hear her breathless, girlish voice mutter "T-E-A-M, Yea, Team.

  Louise Bernikow

  Team, Mean, Men

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• The modern version of Buridan's ass [a figurative description of a man of indecision] has a Ph.D., but no time to grow up as he is undecided between making a Leonardo da Vinci in the test tube or planting a Coca Cola sign on Mars.

  Erwin Chargaff

  Growing Up, Men, Mars

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• In certain countries, people seem to be think that three asses together make one intelligent person. However, that is completely wrong. Several asses in concreto make the ass in abstracto and that is a most terrifying animal.

  Franz Grillparzer

  Country, Animal, Intelligent

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• These CEOs, man ... If you're that ruthless, you're a scary dude. I tell you, now when I walk past a little gang banger, I don't even blink. But if I see a white dude with a Wall Street Journal, I haul ass. Before I walk past the Arthur Andersen building, I cut through the projects. If you cut through the projects, you may just lose what you have on you that day. I ain't never been mugged of my whole future.

  Wanda Sykes

  Wall, Cutting, Past

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• If you want a man that respects the way you think then show more mind than ass.

  David Banner

  Men, Thinking, Mind

  FaceBook post by David Banner from Apr 25, 2015

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