Jokes Quotes - Page 5

• We have to laugh at how hard life can be and how screwed up we can be at times... It's a really freeing process when you're not hitting the jokes too hard.

  Brett Gelman

  Laughing, Hard Life, Hitting

  Source: collider.com

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• I'm an actor. I've always been an actor. I've always approached all my comedy as an actor. I don't really care about jokes either. I tire of jokes.

  Brett Gelman

  Actors, Care, Comedy

  Source: collider.com

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• Even the people who do great jokes, [it's] always coming out of a very real place.

  Brett Gelman

  Real, People, Coming Out

  Source: collider.com

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• Woody Allen - nobody has been a better joke teller than him - and even in his great films, it's always coming out of the character. If you don't have that, jokes are just empty and I think that people rely too much on jokes.

  Brett Gelman

  Character, Thinking, People

  Source: collider.com

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• When you watch an audience watching my movies, you realize that nobody laughs at the same time. Some people enjoy a beat, and then another group of people are laughing at a sight gag, and then someone laughs where nobody laughs before. They're not timed like a comedy. You're not supposed to laugh at every joke. You decide.

  Quentin Dupieux

  Sight, Laughing, People

  Source: collider.com

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• That's what happens with most comedies. If you watch 10 minutes and there's no joke, then you're disappointed because you're expecting jokes. The same goes for emotional movies. You have to feel something. If you don't feel anything for 10 minutes, you get bored.

  Quentin Dupieux

  Emotional, Bored, Watches

  Source: collider.com

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• I don't really consider myself to be a comedian. I mean, it's not like I'm sitting around writing jokes or anything. I just like dressing up and pretending to be other people.

  Amy Sedaris

  Writing, Mean, Dressing Up

  Interview with Will Harris, www.bullz-eye.com. January 7, 2009.

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• Maybe it's because I have too much pride or self-respect, but I thought, `Why does a guy who has thinning hair and who is overweight have to be a loser or a joke?'

  Paul Giamatti

  Pride, Hair, Self

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• I find that when I tell lawyer jokes to a mixed audience, the lawyers don't think they're funny and the non-lawyers don't think they're jokes.

  John Roberts

  Thinking, Lawyer, Audience

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• What makes our marriage holy, what makes it "set apart" and sacramental, isn't the marriage certificate filed away in the basement or the degree to which we follow a list of rules and roles, it's the way God shows up in those everyday moments - loading the dishwasher, sharing a joke, hosting a meal, enduring an illness, working through a disagreement - and gives us the chance to notice, to pay attention to the divine. It's the way the God of resurrection makes all things new.

  Rachel Held Evans

  Giving, Everyday, Roles

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• Who could quarrel with Clark Gable? We got on well. Whenever anyone on the set was tired or depressed, it was Gable who cheered that person up. Then the newspapers began printing the story that Gable and I were not getting on. This was so ridiculous it served only as a joke. From the time on the standard greeting between Clark and myself became, 'How are you not getting on today?'

  Vivien Leigh

  Tired, Stories, Today

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• I think the nerves aspect is a bit of a joke. How hard can it be to walk up and down in a straight line? You just need to put one step in front of another, most people do it all the time. What's the worst that can happen? You fall over. Sometimes that happens to non-models too, it wouldn't be the end of the world.

  Edie Campbell

  Fall, Thinking, People

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• With Congress and the S.E.C. so heavily peopled by lawyers, and with lawyers having been so heavily involved in drafting financial disclosure documents now seen as bogus, there was a new "lawyer" joke every week. One such was: "The butcher says 'the reputation of lawyers has fallen dramatically', and the check-out clerk replies: "How do you fall dramatically off a pancake?

  Charlie Munger

  Fall, Clerks, Pancakes

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• The public is gullible. ... If [many satirists are] making the same joke, that's the danger. Then there's a solidifying effect and it becomes a truth.

  Bill Maher

  Gullible, Danger, Effects

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• I have seen so few films in which the sex felt really respected by the filmmaker. Hollywood too often shies away from it or makes adolescent jokes about it... Sex is only connected to the negative because people are scared of it.

  John Cameron Mitchell

  Sex, People, Hollywood

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• You can dissect a joke just as you can a frog. But it tends to die on you.

  E. B. White

  Frogs, Dies

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• Many of the political jokes that circulated in the Third Reich were directed at Goering. He collected them [all] in a large leather notebook and delighted in re-telling most of them to his friends.

  Richard Overy

  Notebook, Political, Goering

  Richard Overy (2012). “Goering: Hitler's Iron Knight”, p.236, I.B.Tauris

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• I have been asked many times, Why do you laugh so much and make so many jokes? I become serious sometimes-when I have a stomachache! The Lord is all blissfulness. He is the reality behind all that exists. He is the goodness, the truth in everything. You are His incarnations. That is what is glorious. The nearer you are to Him, the less you will have occasions to cry or weep. The further we are from Him, the more will long faces come. The more we know of Him, the more misery vanishes.

  Swami Vivekananda

  Reality, Long, Laughing

  Swami Vivekananda (196?). “Swami Vivekananda on Himself”

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• The trouble with the jokes is that once they're written, I know how they're supposed to work, and all I can do is not hit them. I'm more comfortable improvising. If I have just two or three ideas and I know how the character feels, what the character wants, everything in between is like trapeze work.

  Stephen Colbert

  Character, Ideas, Two

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my brother Ed. As a child, I just absorbed everything they said, and I was always in competition for the laughs.

  Stephen Colbert

  Brother, Children, Cutting

  "How many Stephen Colberts are there?" by Charles McGrath, www.nytimes.com. January 4, 2012.

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• Trans people deserve something vital. They deserve your respect... If you want to call me names, make jokes, doubt my intentions, go ahead, because the reality is I can take it. But for the thousands of kids out there who are coming to terms with being true to who they are, they shouldn't have to take it.

  Bruce Jenner

  Kids, Reality, Names

  Caitlyn Jenner's ESPYs Speech, www.businessinsider.com. July 16, 2015.

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• There are elements of that, where you'll see a scene again and you'll recognize it, but I wouldn't say it's got one conceit like that, at all. It definitely has those jokes, but it would be wrong to say this is a show where, every time you see it, you see a new angle.

  Mitchell Hurwitz

  Would Be, Elements, Scene

  Source: collider.com

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• I'm not used to be the adult. I'm not very good at being the adult. To some regard, I wanted to just hang out and joke around, like I would normally, but I had to try to find the movie to shoot.

  Jamie Linden

  Trying, Adults, Used

  Source: collider.com

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• I'm not as serious of a person as people make me out to be. Most people would think that I would be less successful in comedy, but I can crack a joke as well as anyone else.

  T.I.

  Successful, Thinking, People

  Source: collider.com

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• I think, in comedy, timing is everything. You and I could tell the same joke, but if one of our timing is off, it won't be as funny. You've gotta know when to deliver your punch-lines.

  T.I.

  Thinking, Lines, Comedy

  Source: collider.com

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