Jim Gaffigan Quotes About Children

Quotes about: Children

• No matter how you feel about your extended family or family gatherings you will be attending. This is because now the ultimate reason for attending family gatherings is for your children to have the time of their lives with their cousins. Little kids love their cousins. I’m not being cute or exaggerating here. Cousins are like celebrities for little kids. If little kids had a People magazine, cousins would be on the cover. Cousins are the barometers of how fun a family get-together will be. “Are the cousins going to be there? Fun!

  Jim Gaffigan

  Cute, Cousin, Fun

  Jim Gaffigan (2013). “Dad Is Fat”, p.226, Crown Archetype

• There should be a children's song: 'If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep'.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Fathers Day, Song, Children

  FaceBook post by Jim Gaffigan from May 09, 2012

• People get burned out in big families, you can even see it in the naming of children. Like the first kid, "You were named after Grandma." The seventh kid, "You were named after a sandwich I had. Now get your brother, Reuben."

  Jim Gaffigan

  Funny, Brother, Children

• I have more pictures of my children than my father ever looked at me.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Father, My Children

  "Jim Gaffigan Thinks Phone Photos Are Ruining America’s Children, He Tells Conan" by Ross Luippold, www.huffingtonpost.com. April 13, 2012.

• I guess the reasons against having more children always seem uninspiring and superficial. What exactly am I missing out on? Money? A few more hours of sleep? A more peaceful meal? More hair? These are nothing compared to what I get from these five monsters who rule my life.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Sleep, Hair

  Jim Gaffigan (2013). “Dad Is Fat”, p.240, Crown Archetype

• Whenever one of my children says, 'Goodnight, Daddy,' I always think to myself, 'You don't mean that.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Fathers Day, Children, Dad

  FaceBook post by Jim Gaffigan from Oct 19, 2012

• Ironically, to my children, bedtime is a punishment that violates their basic rights as human beings.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Rights, Punishment

• Now that I'm married and have two beautiful children, it really makes me appreciate... being alone.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Beautiful, Children, Two

• I reached a point in my life where I didn't really like who I was.I was married to an amazing woman. I had children, and yet there was frustration.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Frustration, Married

  Source: www.npr.org

• My children have made me a better man, which is - in the end, that's probably more important than two more comedy specials or being in better shape.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Men, Two

  "Comic Jim Gaffigan On Stand-Up, Faith And Opening For The Pope". "Fresh Air" with Terry Gross, www.npr.org. September 24, 2015.

• Other people's children's birthday parties are the most joyful events you will ever resent having to attend.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Children, Party, People

  "Dad Is Fat". Book by Jim Gaffigan, May 7, 2013.

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