Nobody out-rednecks the great state of America.
You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.
The album is a definite departure. I haven't written original material before, except for one song on my first album, but Elvis and I did six songs together on this one.
You might be a redneck if...the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.
You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
I'm against gun control. It's not that I like guns, it's just that allowing Americans to have guns will increase the chances that a bunch of rednecks will blow each other's heads off.
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
Among the rednecks of America, which there are many more than people seem to realize, it was terribly damaging. I got blamed for O.J.'s acquittal.
You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.
"Rednecks" always made me nervous to play, but I'm glad I wrote it and I continue to play it. It's just that the language is so rough.
You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
How is a redneck divorce similar to a tornado? You know that somewhere, somehow, someone is gonna lose a trailer.
You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine.
You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.
You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be a redneck.
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