Jokes Quotes - Page 20

• I came across an old story of mine that I'd written a decade ago. The main joke of the story is that a mother is telling her children about how she met their father online. The majority of memories the mother has all have to do with really funny links he sent her, a music download that she loved, etc. - and because of these superficial details she fell in love with the father. Reading it today, it's hardly a dystopian story; it's simply a realistic story about how people actually meet.

  Alexander Weinstein

  Mother, Memories, Children

  Source: www.raintaxi.com

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• No matter what I face, I must have a mindset that 'it must go this way.' Although it gets to the point where I can't joke around for fun, I'm working hard right now, which is why I think I can look at matters through an objective point of view.

  Yunho

  Fun, Thinking, Views

  Source: tohosomnia.livejournal.com

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• I believe fully in making fun of children. I believe very strongly that you should never make fun of an embryo or your ovaries. I am a big believer on breaking those rules. It's a case-by-case basis. But the thing is, there's so many ways to make a joke about something that is sort of maybe verboten or something.

  Kathy Griffin

  Children, Fun, Believe

  Source: thecelebritycafe.com

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• The reasons I never set out to do a talk show is they're formulaic. People come out, tell jokes and read questions. But that's not what I do, and we built the show around my skill set.

  Harry Connick, Jr.

  Skills, People, Reason

  Source: www.patheos.com

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• So many people joke that life with me - a professed lifelong penny pincher - must be tough. But [my husband] is a great money manager. And he helps me let go of my fear of spending while still being frugal.

  Michelle Singletary

  Letting Go, Husband, People

  Source: www.sfgate.com

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• A lot of people would flee from what they think is award-show cheesiness, and I don't. I often joke that my speeches are very personal moments that play themselves out in front of billions of people.

  Tom Hanks

  Thinking, Play, Awards

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• My first lessons in comedy, how to construct a joke, I learned from Eileen Brennan, who had unbelievable timing.

  Rob Lowe

  Lessons, Firsts, Comedy

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• [The Outsiders] was very competitive, in the best possible way. Full of love, full of companionship and fellowship, pranks and practical jokes and ball-busting.

  Rob Lowe

  Fellowship, Way, Outsiders

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• At the time, it was a really funny joke [Fluffy] and I went back and forth with going against the joke or embrace it. I decided to embrace it and now we're talking about it, so it was a good call.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Talking, Fluffy, Funny Jokes

  Source: mstarsnews.musictimes.com

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• [ The aim to be big] is not a joke about my size. It's just that I'm a dreamer, but I'm following through with it. I believe anyone can do it as long as they focus and have a game plan.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Believe, Games, Long

  Source: www.themonitor.com

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• I've got foundation jokes, the ones that got me where I am, so everything I do just builds on top of that.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Foundation

  Source: goseetalk.com

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• I like to tell old jokes on stage after about an hour, or an hour and a half. I'll bring those old ones back because the fans love them.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Fans, Half, Hours

  Source: goseetalk.com

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• The reason everybody is so amazed and enamored with me right now is because I have worked every angle, I have worked every formula, I have worked every equation, I have seen every club, I have seen every performance, I have seen every joke, I have studied, I have done my job. That's why I'm good. It's not because I got up one night and decided I wanted to tell some f - -ing jokes.

  Leslie Jones

  Jobs, Night, Done

  Source: w.espn.go.com

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• If I see someone not laughing, the first thing I'm thinking is, "OK, am I cursing too much? Am I doing a joke he doesn't understand? Is he resting?" Then he starts becoming my focal point. Once I see him laugh, I'm like, [snap] "All right, now I'm funny."

  Leslie Jones

  Thinking, Laughing, Too Much

  "The Conversation: Saturday Night Live's Leslie Jones". Interview with Allison Glock, www.espn.com. February 17, 2017.

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• We're not going to have a wall [on Southern border] like now which is either non-existent or a joke.

  Donald Trump

  Wall, Southern, Borders

  Source: www.esquire.com

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• My general approach to writing fiction is that you try to have as few conceptual notions as possible and you just respond to the energy that the story is making rather than having a big over plan. I think if you have a big over plan, the danger is that you might just take your plan and then you bore everybody. I always joke that it's like going on a date with index cards. You know, at 7:30 p.m. I should ask about her mother. You keep all the control to yourself but you are kind of insulting to the other person.

  George Saunders

  Mother, Writing, Thinking

  Source: therumpus.net

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• I enjoy Modern Family very much. Good TV program. I don't know why. I just find that so many of the jokes land. So many of the actors are so great. Phil Dunphy is one of my favorite characters ever.

  Doug Benson

  Character, Land, Modern Family

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• My parents took me to that I think is just one of those near-perfect comedies is Young Frankenstein. Gene Wilder and Mel Brooks, they're at the height of their game. The two of them working together was amazing. Yeah, just a terrific story. You get emotionally involved. Jokes all the time, jokes that come from story. Like, they don't have to go wildly out of their way to make the jokes. It's a parody of Frankenstein movies, but also it stands as one of the great ones, one of the great Frankenstein movies.

  Doug Benson

  Thinking, Two, Games

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• [Donald] Trump, he - you know, buy American, buy American, anti-free trade, and got big cheers. They're waving Russian flags, probably partly as a joke. But, still, the party has become an ethnic nationalist party.

  Mark Shields

  Cheer, Party, Flags

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• There are terrific TV shows now. This is a golden age for TV humor, I think. There's an actual market there. Of course, I have no idea how you'd break in, but there must be a way. They have all these shows and they need jokes and somebody is writing them.

  Dave Barry

  Writing, Thinking, Tv Shows

  Source: www.writersdigest.com

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• I am an artist who's just tryin' to do something different, and basically not caring about everybody's opinions and wanting to follow what everybody else is doing. At the same time, I know when to be serious, but I know when to joke.

  Tyga

  Caring, Artist, Different

  Source: djbooth.net

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• In college I took an acting class as a joke. It sounded like something fun and easy at the time. I had originally wanted to go to art school, but I gave all that up because I didn't want to be a starving artist.

  Michael Graziadei

  Art, Fun, School

  Source: soaps.sheknows.com

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• I want to get that same feeling that everybody logging on to our website is sharing a little bit of an inside joke, and the rest of the world is oblivious to it although I want to have most of the world.

  Stan Lee

  Feelings, World, Want

  Source: www.ign.com

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• It happened: the first 9/11, it happened on September 11, 1973, in Chile. We did it. Was that interfering or hacking a party? This record is all over the world, constantly overthrowing governments, invading, forcing people to follow what we call democracy, as in the cases I mentioned. As I say, if every charge is accurate, it's a joke, and I'm sure half the world is collapsing in laughter about this, because people outside the United States know it. You don't have to tell people in Chile about the first 9/11.

  Noam Chomsky

  Laughter, Party, Government

  Source: www.counterpunch.org

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• Improv requires your audience to be informed about what improv is. With stand-up, anybody can sit down and watch stand-up and laugh at jokes.

  Kurt Braunohler

  Laughing, Watches, Down And

  Source: www.avclub.com

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