Comedian Quotes - Page 30

• It was a very interesting experience. You know, I don't think words could do it justice. Roseanne [Barr] is a comedian, a laugh a minute at every turn, and this time around she was actually going to be the vice presidential candidate of another Green Party candidate. So I guess she's still in the mix in some ways,sort of learning her politics as she goes, like a lot of us Americans who are getting thrown under the bus and for whom it is not a laughing matter. We are going to stand up and take this seriously and refuse to be intimidated out of the future that we deserve.

  Jill Stein

  Party, Thinking, Justice

  "Off Message" with Glenn Thrush, www.politico.com. September 19, 2016.

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• Since we are made up of comedians and filmmakers and writers and improvisers, we have the unique opportunity to bring joy to people who are sometimes buried in their own lives or are subjected to the bullshit that clinic workers are subjected to every day.

  Lizz Winstead

  Opportunity, Unique, Bullshit

  Source: www.glamour.com

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• Not a time with him passed that I didn't say, "You should've been a comedian." [Vincent Price] was hilarious. He was just such a quick, funny wit. I don't think most people would think that about him, and it was really surprising to me. But man, the guy had a brilliant wit.

  Cassandra Peterson

  Men, Thinking, People

  "Elvira on her date with Elvis and the fish recipe she got from Vincent Price". Interview with Katie Rife, aux.avclub.com. October 5, 2016.

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• Most comedians come from a dark past and have a lot of sadness.

  Molly Shannon

  Sadness, Dark, Past

  Source: www.mtv.com

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• I loved smart and fearless comedians like Joan Rivers and Don Rickles. When they started out, what they did wasn't always socially accepted, but they both had careers that lasted over 50 years.

  Roy Haylock

  Smart, Years, Careers

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

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• I wasn't the good looking guy, I wasn't the hot chick, I wasn't the fat guy, I didn't have a catchphrase, I didn't wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.

  Bill Burr

  Silly, Guy, Trying

  Source: brightestyoungthings.com

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• So many people there are in politics that they're overly cautious about laughing at stuff. They're so damned concerned about what everyone else is thinking. What are they worried about? Nobody ever walked into a show as a bleeding heart liberal and had a comedian undo 30 years of life experience.

  Bill Burr

  Heart, Thinking, Years

  Source: brightestyoungthings.com

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• There's a big thing right now with people using stand-up as a scapegoat. People think comedians have the power to change someone in an hour. If we had that ability, the art would not be legal. It would too dangerous.

  Bill Burr

  Art, Thinking, People

  Source: brightestyoungthings.com

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• I love comedy. If I could be a comedian - well, I probably would not take that job because it seems really hard, but I wish I could be.

  Taylor Momsen

  Jobs, Wish, Comedy

  Source: www.cosmopolitan.com

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• When you're a young comedian the first thing you want to do is get a laugh.

  Baron Vaughn

  Laughing, Want, Firsts

  Source: brightestyoungthings.com

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• I like to read, but otherwise I'm just your average, self-obsessed comedian. It's pretty much all I think about.

  Anthony Jeselnik

  Thinking, Self, Average

  "Comedian Anthony Jeselnik: “He’s The Best!” -Everybody". Interview With David Dean, www.serialoptimist.com. November 29, 2010.

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• I would have liked to be a comedian in the '20s, or maybe even a comedian on the Mayflower and have a statue somewhere.

  Dani Levy

  Mayflower, Statues

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• There are way too many comedians now.

  Dani Levy

  Way

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• I think a lot of comedians sometimes pretend to find the job more taxing than it is.

  Dani Levy

  Jobs, Thinking, Sometimes

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• A poet or a comedian can say what's on the mind of people. They should be funny. They should make you laugh. It may be so truthful that it hurts, but it makes you laugh.

  Russell Simmons

  Hurt, People, Laughing

  Source: www.ebony.com

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• I am able to apply certain things to my craft that maybe other comedians don't, because I'm a devotee.

  Hari Kondabolu

  Able, Crafts, Certain

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• I play a garbage man who moonlights as a stand-up comedian. Terrible.

  Judd Nelson

  Men, Play, Garbage

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• It's like being a stand-up comedian is what leads to being a talk-show host. That life is not cut out for a woman, being on the road at these disgusting hotels. What girls want to do that? Gross guys want to do that. I think that the dearth in female comics is just the nature of the business, but there certainly isn't a dearth anymore, so I think it's just silly.

  Chelsea Handler

  Girl, Silly, Cutting

  Source: variety.com

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• I usually just say I'm a stand-up comedian, but I use looping machines to create ideas with my voice.

  Reggie Watts

  Ideas, Voice, Machines

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• Good comedians are great philosophers.

  Reggie Watts

  Philosopher, Great Philosophers

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• I could be a comedian. I could be a gangster. I could play all of those parts, even for the first time... I'm versatile.

  Lil Boosie

  Play, Firsts, First Time

  Source: djbooth.net

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• While painting I noticed a piece of madras cloth on the floor. As usual, my mind started working overtime and a pair of scissors and a small amount of glue later...I created THE COMEDIAN. Everybody loved the uniqueness of the painting. It was indeed a hit.

  St. Lucia

  Mind, Usual, Glue

  Source: arcthemagazine.com

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• The key is that I'm always relevant. Some of these comedians have nothing to say. They don't have any ideas so it's "F" this and "F" that. They give you a whole series of swear words and it's really just a way for them to get themselves out of trouble when they can't come up with anything. They're irrelevant and ridiculous.

  Jackie Mason

  Ideas, Keys, Giving

  Source: spectator.org

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• As far as Ken Kwapis saying all those things, I think he just really wanted me in the movie so he probably told Warner Brothers, 'Don't worry, Jimmy Stewart? Gary Cooper? Who else do you like?' If they'd said they were huge Chris Farley fans, he's like, 'He can do that, too. He's a huge physical comedian.' But no, that's really nice to hear.

  John Krasinski

  Brother, Nice, Thinking

  "Mandy Moore and John Krasinski Interview - LICENSE TO WED". Interview with Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, collider.com. July 2, 2007.

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• The intention is to make people laugh, to make people happy. It's unselfish, it's in the service of others, and as a comedian you are making yourself vulnerable in order to make others happy. And it has a transformative power.

  Margaret Cho

  Make Others Happy, Order, People

  Source: www.guernicamag.com

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