Bob Hope Quotes About Golf

Quotes about: Golf

• I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.

  Bob Hope

  Lying, Golf, Caddies

• Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you will go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and, for no reason at all, you really stink.

  Bob Hope

  Hope, Golf, Games

• If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him.

  Bob Hope

  Dirty, Golf, Play

• Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Hope, Golf

• Golf's really fun in Japan because of the women caddies. ... I saw one guy start out playing alone with his caddie. By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Humorous, Golf

• Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.

  Bob Hope

  Real, Golf, Pay

• Golf is a funny game. It's done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I'm the healthiest idiot in the world.

  Bob Hope

  Hope, Golf, Games

• If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Thinking, Ifs

• I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Play, Age

• I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Age, Ifs

• Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Green, Pay

• Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

  Bob Hope

  Fun, Lying, Golf

• I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it's silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I'm breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That's what gives me the strength to break the club.

  Bob Hope

  Beautiful, Silly, Golf

• A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Shooting, Fields

• If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Hope, Inspirational Sports

• Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it's also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.

  Bob Hope

  Beautiful, Successful, Golf

• Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Bags, Firsts

• Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass.

  Bob Hope

  Sports, Golf, Player

• Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.

  Bob Hope

  Beach, Golf, Pebbles

• Vice President Spiro Agnew can not cheat on his score : because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, President, Vices

• It's not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course - you just follow the wounded.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Wounded, Courses

• My old friend Jack Benny has only had one ball all his golfing life. And now he's lost it. The string came off!

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Old Friends, Balls

• We're on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It's a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.

  Bob Hope

  Mistake, Golf, Waiting

• Arnold Palmer is the biggest crowd pleaser since the invention of the portable sanitary facility.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Crowds, Invention

• Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Winning, Play

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