David Sedaris Quotes

Quotes about:

• 

  Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings.

  David Sedaris

  Funny Love, Hurt, Real

  «At The Movies With David & Sarah» by David Sedaris, www.esquire.com. January 29, 2007.

  65 Copy quote

• Art isn't about following the rules. It's about breaking them.

  David Sedaris

  Art, Art Is, Following

  David Sedaris (2010). “When You Are Engulfed In Flames”, p.87, Hachette UK

  5 Copy quote
• 

  I haven't got the slightest idea how to change people, but still I keep a long list of prospective candidates just in case I should ever figure it out.

  David Sedaris

  Life, Ideas, Long

  David Sedaris (2010). “Naked”, p.156, Hachette UK

  16 Copy quote

• When someone tell me they illegally downloaded one of my audiobooks I think, Thanks a lot, Pal. When someone tells me they checked my book out of the library, I'm delighted. I've always been a big library user, and feel a kinship with others who do the same thing.

  David Sedaris

  Book, Thinking, Library

  "Ask the Author Live: David Sedaris". Live chat, www.newyorker.com. August 14, 2009.

  5 Copy quote

• When asked "What do we need to learn this for?" any high-school teacher can confidently answer that, regardless of the subject, the knowledge will come in handy once the student hits middle age and starts working crossword puzzles in order to stave off the terrible loneliness.

  David Sedaris

  Teacher, Loneliness, School

  David Sedaris (2000). “Me talk pretty one day”

  25 Copy quote

• We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.

  David Sedaris

  Drinking, Healing, Emotional

  David Sedaris (2010). “Naked”, p.175, Hachette UK

  11 Copy quote

• Their house had real hardcover books in it, and you often saw them lying open on the sofa, the words still warm from being read.

  David Sedaris

  Lying, Real, Book

  "Loggerheads" by David Sedaris, www.newyorker.com. December 7, 2009.

  12 Copy quote

• As a child I assumed that when I reached adulthood, I would have grown-up thoughts.

  David Sedaris

  Funny, Children, Growing Up

  8 Copy quote

• Weird doors open. People fall into things.

  David Sedaris

  Fall, Doors, People

  David Sedaris (2010). “When You Are Engulfed In Flames”, p.50, Hachette UK

  8 Copy quote

• Comfort has its place, but it seems rude to visit another country dressed as if you’ve come to mow its lawns.

  David Sedaris

  Country, Travel, Rude

  David Sedaris (2000). “Me talk pretty one day”

  14 Copy quote

• Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have left to hold onto.

  David Sedaris

  Hipster, Sometimes, Sin

  5 Copy quote

• Remember that the most important thing is to try and love other people as much as they love you.

  David Sedaris

  Love You, People, Important

  David Sedaris (2009). “Barrel Fever: Stories and Essays”, p.162, Hachette UK

  24 Copy quote

• States vote to take away my marriage rights, and even though I don't want to get married, it tends to hurt my feelings. I guess what bugs me is that it was put to a vote in the first place. If you don't want to marry a homosexual, then don't. But what gives you the right to weigh in on your neighbor's options? It's like voting whether or not redheads should be allowed to celebrate Christmas.

  David Sedaris

  Hurt, Rights, Giving

  David Sedaris (2013). “Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls”, p.75, Hachette UK

  20 Copy quote

• I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you.

  David Sedaris

  Thinking, People, Like You

  "A life in writing: David Sedaris" by Hadley Freeman, www.theguardian.com. October 11, 2010.

  5 Copy quote

• Write relentlessly, until you find your voice. Then, use it.

  David Sedaris

  Writing, Voice, Use

  7 Copy quote

• All of us take pride and pleasure in the fact that we are unique, but I'm afraid that when all is said and done the police are right: it all comes down to fingerprints.

  David Sedaris

  Pride, Unique, Police

  David Sedaris (2009). “Barrel Fever: Stories and Essays”, p.158, Hachette UK

  31 Copy quote

• I'd always thought that I understood this, but lately I realize that what I call "understanding" is basically just fantasizing.

  David Sedaris

  Understanding, Realizing, Understood

  "Memento Mori" by David Sedaris, www.newyorker.com. May 8, 2006.

  5 Copy quote

• I can't seem to fathom that the things important to me are not important to other people as well, and so I come off sounding like a missionary, someone whose job it is to convert rather than listen.

  David Sedaris

  Jobs, People, Important

  "Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim". Book by David Sedaris, 2004.

  8 Copy quote

• Like all of my friends, she's a lousy judge of character.

  David Sedaris

  Character, Judging, Judge Of Character

  David Sedaris (2000). “Me talk pretty one day”

  18 Copy quote

• If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?

  David Sedaris

  Toilets, Saws, Scream

  "Author, Author?" by David Sedaris, www.newyorker.com. March 30, 2009.

  11 Copy quote

• You can't brace yourself for famine if you've never known hunger.

  David Sedaris

  Hunger, Braces, Famine

  David Sedaris (2009). “Naked”, p.191, Hachette UK

  8 Copy quote

• Living in a foreign country is one of those things that everyone should try at least once. My understanding was that it completed a person, sanding down the rough provincial edges and transforming you into a citizen of the world. What I find appealing in life abroad was the inevitable sense of helplessness it would inspire. Equally exciting would be the work involved in overcoming that helplessness. There would be a goal involved, and I like having goals.

  David Sedaris

  Country, Goal, Understanding

  5 Copy quote

• Oh, for Christ's sake,' I hear. 'Can we please just try to have a good time?' This is like ordering someone to find you attractive, and it doesn't work. I've tried it.

  David Sedaris

  Trying, Sake, Good Times

  5 Copy quote

• If you read someone else's diary, you get what you deserve.

  David Sedaris

  Inspirational, Diaries, What You Deserve

  9 Copy quote

• As bad a dresser as I am, anything beats being judged by my character.

  David Sedaris

  Character, Beats, Dressers

  4 Copy quote

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