Threesome Quotes

• I like threesomes with two women, not because I'm a cynical sexual predator. Oh no! But because I'm a romantic. I'm looking for "The One." And I'll find her more quickly if I audition two at a time.

  Russell Brand

  Sex, Two, Cynical

  FaceBook post by Russell Brand from May 28, 2012

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• When it comes to sex, at my age I like threesomes. In case one of us dies.

  Rodney Dangerfield

  Sex, Age, Cases

  54 Copy quote

• How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?

  Dov Davidoff

  Play, Used, Strings

  FaceBook post by Dov Davidoff from Jul 14, 2011

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• He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.

  Adam Carolla

  Funny, Humor, Guy

  26 Copy quote

• "Did those nice church ladies come by again?" He nodded. "I asked them if a man died and then the woman remarried, and then the three of them met in heaven, would it be a sin for them to have a threesome, since they were all married in God's eye. And they decided they were late to be somewhere else."

  Ilona Andrews

  Nice, Eye, Men

  "Gunmetal Magic". Book by Ilona Andrews, 2012.

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• Ok, this is the most unfun threesome I have ever been a part of. Nobody's having sex and someone is yelling. I'm out of here.

  James Van Der Beek

  Sex, Yelling, Having Sex

  25 Copy quote

• Three has always been tougher than Two. Think of any of your famous threesomes. The Three Stooges? Look at the anger there. My bet is that before Curly was born, Moe and Larry could play together for hours without even a single poke in the eye. Huey, Dewey, and Louie? Donald Duck never had a moment's peace. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly? I rest my case.

  Paul Reiser

  Eye, Thinking, Play

  Paul Reiser (2012). “Babyhood”, p.11, Harper Collins

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• I could never have a threesome. This is not a threesome body. This is a turn off the lights body, leave your shirt on body - this is a tell nobody.

  Felipe Esparza

  Light, Body, Shirts

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• When you're 19, a threesome is normal. It's fun.

  Nate Parker

  Fun, Normal

  Source: www.ebony.com

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• I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.

  Bo Burnham

  Bipolar, Bears, Mets

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• What about Beck?" "Backwoods Boy? Are you crazy? It'd be a threesome - me, him and his overbearing ego. Definitely doomed to failure.

  Jana Oliver

  Crazy, Boys, Ego

  Jana Oliver (2011). “Soul Thief: A Demon Trappers Novel”, p.66, Macmillan

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• I always wondered about that woman who had that face transplant. If you went to bed with her, would that technically count as a threesome?

  Frankie Boyle

  Funny, Humor, Bed

  16 Copy quote

• She was my mother. I couldn't threaten to slap, stab, beat or even name call her. I tried to think of something to scare her into never mentioning the predicament with the Dreamsnatcher again. I'll become a swinger," I said. her eyes bugged. Uptight rearing made her uncomfortable with alternate lifestyles. "That's right. threesomes, foursomes, and more. bones knows about a thousand chicks who'd love to hop into bed with us. It'll be kinky, we'll get out freak on.-

  Jeaniene Frost

  Mother, Eye, Thinking

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• I believe the media pretty much dictates the way relationships are handled, even in the way we handle ourselves. Abuse, cheating, threesomes, it's inspired by music and television. Irresponsible artists and writers with a hidden agenda, just working against the moral fabric that God intended for us to have.

  Tony Gaskins

  Cheating, Believe, Artist

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• A threesome with a mother and her two twins.

  Jeremy Shockey

  Mother, Two, Twins

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• Jim Cummings, Whoopie Goldberg & Cheech Marin make up this famous Disney threesome.

  Alex Trebek

  11 Copy quote

• Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They're a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.

  Bobby Heenan

  Wwe, Lovely, Twenties

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• It was very nerve-wracking for me. I had to be drunk and have a threesome. I'm not that guy. Bobby Cannavale is that guy. But it was Vegas and things got crazy, and it happened. We go to Vegas to try to sign Elvis Presley and things get crazy. My character [in Vinyl] is stoned.

  Ray Romano

  Crazy, Character, Vegas

  Source: collider.com

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• In the first season (of 'Californication'), when we had the threesome with the nipple clamps, I was, like, 'I don't get this, I don't know how you're gonna do it.' And then, all of a sudden, there's a crane with a camera hanging over our heads, and you're, like, 'Okayyyyyyy. But how are you gonna sell this? How are you gonna make it work?' And they ended up shooting it brilliantly, cutting it together, and it just all ended up working without me having to compromise my own personal morals.

  Pamela Adlon

  Cutting, Together, Cameras

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• Although I get a lot of specialty services like wraps, scrubs, and mustache removal, my favorite is the simple manicure/pedicure. They work on your hands and feet at the same time while you sit in a vibrating chair. I call it the sorority girls version of a threesome.

  Jen Lancaster

  Girl, Simple, Hands

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• The only siblings I have are half-siblings. My nuclear family would have been an extra-suffocating threesome. Instead, I have an interesting brother and sister, in-laws, and darling nephews.

  Jane Smiley

  Brother, Sibling, Sister In Law

  "Divorce! It’s Good for the Children!" by Jane Smiley, www.huffingtonpost.com. November 12, 2010.

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