Airline Quotes - Page 5

• Modern air travel means less time spent in transit. That time is now spent in transit lounges.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Funny, Humorous, Food

  P.J. O'Rourke (2012). “Holidays in Hell”, p.16, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus.

  Erma Bombeck

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• If Charles Lindbergh, flying with no instruments other than a bologna sandwich, managed to cross the Atlantic and land safely on a runway completely covered with French people, why are today's airplanes, which are equipped with radar and computers and individualized liquor bottles, unable to cope with fog?

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.234, Ballantine Books

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• Granted, this system is insane, but we must not let sanity stand in the way of airport security.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

  Dave Barry (2003). “Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, but Some Actual Journalism”, p.182, Crown Archetype

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• Any serious airline has to look at a worldwide network.

  Vijay Mallya

  Looks, Serious

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• Look at airport security now. What started out as definite racial profiling is now where the computer picks a name. That's why you get a seven-month-old getting a pat down. [Imitates a security officer.] "Check the diapers. They're full."

  Robin Williams

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• The Hawaiian Islands were discovered by hardy Polynesian sailors, who crossed thousands of miles of open ocean in primitive canoes, braving violent storm-tossed seas for months at a time. My family and I arrived by modern commercial aviation, which was infinitely worse.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Ocean

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry Talks Back”, p.107, Crown Archetype

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• Curiously, a principle affects your life whether you are aware of it or not. For instance, the principle of gravity was working long before the apple ever fell on Newton's head. But once it did, and he understood it, then we as a society were free to harness this principle to create, among other things, airline flight.

  Andy Andrews

  Apples, Long, Principles

  ABC NEWS Interview, abcnews.go.com.

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• Ill book a ticket on some garbage airline. I dont wanna name an actual airline so lets make one up, lets just call it like Delta Airlines

  John Mulaney

  Book, Names, Garbage

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• The planes are crowded and noisy and late, and everybody hates everybody. If armed terrorists had tried to hijack any of the flights I've been on lately, we passengers would have swiftly beaten them to death with those hard rolls you get with your in-flight meals.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Hate, Humorous

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.127, Ballantine Books

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• There was nothing subtle about our landing. The pilot just pointed the nose at the ground and let her rip.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Rip, Humorous

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• I was told to hand over my disposable lighter, to prevent, I suppose, any threat of "Do what I say or I'll light this Marlboro and you'll all die - in thirty years due to inhalation of secondhand smoke."

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Funny, Humorous, Food

  P.J. O'Rourke (2009). “Peace Kills”, p.58, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• Law of Airlines: The shorter the time between flights, the greater the distance between gates.

  Doug Larson

  Distance, Law, Flight

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• Airlines need staff to fly and maintain their aircraft. They need to pay applicable taxes and gate fees. They need to buy new planes, repair worn-out parts, manage their company pension plan, and everything else a service industry has to do. But by far, the largest chunk of their non-payroll operating budget goes to fuel. That's what costs the most for any given flight.

  Andy Weir

  Flight, Taxes, Gates

  Source: www.businessinsider.com

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• What opened up the American West was the fact that you owned the real estate. You owned the gold mines, the oil wells. The creation of these, back then, million dollar industries drove the railroads and eventually the airlines to provide this kind of transportation.

  Peter Diamandis

  Real, Oil, American West

  "Big Think Interview With Peter Diamandis". Interview with Paul Hoffman, bigthink.com. January 26, 2010.

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• So I wanted to put that to rest: So you have the water, you have the steaks, you have the airline that I sold. I mean, what's wrong with selling?Every once in a while you can sell something. You have the wines and all of that. And Trump University, we're going to start it up as soon as I win the lawsuit.

  Donald Trump

  Wine, Mean, Winning

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• Whatever happened to Trump Airlines? How about Trump University? And then there's Trump Magazine and Trump Vodka and Trump Steaks, and Trump Mortgage? A business genius he [Donald Trump] is not.

  Mitt Romney

  Genius, Magazines, Mortgage

  "First on CNN: Team Romney explores blocking Trump at RNC" by Jamie Gangel and Eric Bradner, www.cnn.com. March 3, 2016.

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• People hear from Donald Trump that he's such an extraordinary success. They didn't know about Trump airlines and Trump mortgages and Trump vitamin network and Trump steaks and Trump Taj Mahal. They didn't realize a lot of small people have been crushed by Donald Trump's rise to become a very wealthy man, successful financially, but this is a guy who has not been a uniform success.

  Mitt Romney

  Successful, Men, People

  Source: www.realclearpolitics.com

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• When I worked at Microsoft, I got to go and visit a bunch of different companies. Probably a hundred different companies a year. You'd see all the different ways they'd work. The guys who did Ventura Publisher one day, and then United Airlines the next. You'd see the 12 guys in Texas doing Doom, and then you'd go see Aetna life insurance.

  Gabe Newell

  Texas, Years, Guy

  "Valve’s Gabe Newell discusses the frontiers of gaming, from wearable technology to 'tongue controllers'". Interview with Ed Fries, venturebeat.com. July 25, 2012.

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• When a major airline goes on a route that a new entrant has gone into, reduces fares, increases capacity, and then when the new entrant goes off, they leave the route, that's not competition.

  John McCain

  Competition, Gone, Goes On

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• If airline seat cushions are such great flotation devices, why don't you ever see anyone take one to the beach?

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Beach, Devices, Seats

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• I retired at twenty-nine, bought a life-time pass on American Airlines and my only goal in life was to party like a mad man and get drunk with as many people as possible. And I was happy right there. But when we started the streaming business, I knew it could be something big.

  Mark Cuban

  Party, Men, People

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• It may be annoying, but the rash of hijackings by Connecticut WASP girls surely explains the time-consuming - but still somehow completely useless - examination of my personal effects. We all have to make sacrifices for airline safety.

  Ann Coulter

  Girl, Sacrifice, Safety

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• I do take a computer to do some processing live and I might use a couple of plug-in synthesisers, 'cause obviously you can take quite a lot of power in terms of sound generation on a computer that I can trigger from a couple of keyboards. And it means I don't have to take some of my vintage stuff and have it trashed by various airlines which has happened in the past. But I still take some vintage stuff with me, I'll take that risk because I like using all that stuff.

  Thighpaulsandra

  Couple, Mean, Past

  Source: thequietus.com

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• I flew out here on Southwest Airlines. Southwest has a plane that's painted like Shamu the whale from Sea World. Yeah, that'll be easy to find if that went down in the ocean. That'll be nice, when you're trying to get out and a real whale's humping your window.

  Robert Schimmel

  Real, Nice, Ocean

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