Airline Quotes - Page 4

• For us to ignore by inaction the slaughter of American civilians and American soldiers, whether in nightclubs or airline terminals, is simply not in the American tradition. Self-defense is not only our right, it is our duty.

  Ronald Reagan

  Self, Soldier, Defense

  Ronald Reagan (2004). “Speaking My Mind: Selected Speeches”, p.288, Simon and Schuster

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• Carl Icahn told me to stay away from airlines. In good times, the unions take away the profits, and in bad times, the cost of oil kills you.

  Mian Muhammad Mansha

  Oil, Cost, Unions

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• I knew I'd chosen the wrong airline when I noticed the sick bag had the Lord's Prayer on it.

  Les Dawson

  Funny, Travel, Prayer

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• Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, Travel, Car

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• This book is dedicated to Wilbur and Orville Wright, without whom air sickness would still be just a dream.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Dream, Humorous

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need”, p.5, Ballantine Books

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• Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just hand you a dinner roll you could kill a musk ox with.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

  Dave Barry (1994). “The World According to Dave Barry”, Outlet

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• A hundred years ago, it could take you the better part of a year to get from New York to California; whereas today, because of equipment problems at O'Hare, you can't get there at all.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, New York, Humorous

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need”, p.9, Ballantine Books

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• The painting world is awash with people who cannot paint. This is a condition that would not be tolerated in other professions such as Dentistry, Medicine, or among members of the Airline Pilot's Association.

  Robert Genn

  Medicine, People, World

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• Motto of the U.S. airline industry - "We're Hoping to Have a Motto Announcement in About an Hour."

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• The Russians will never be able to get their missiles thought the dense protective layer of delayed flights circling over the United States in complex, puke-inducing holding patterns.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• Now you can't even carry a nail clipper on a plane. Are they afraid you're going to go..."All right! Give me the plane or the b*tch loses her cuticle." ?

  Robin Williams

  Humorous, Giving, Nails

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• The thing about commuting internationally is that you have to be a lawyer or an airline steward to do it successfully.

  Joan Juliet Buck

  Lawyer, Stewards, Commuting

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• The Czech ease has become my saving grace for traveling! Plus,with its light weight and small size, I save thousands of dollars every year in airline fees.

  Esperanza Spalding

  Light, Years, Grace

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• If the security personnel do their job properly, they just might cause you to miss your plane, thereby possibly saving your life.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Jobs, Humorous

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need”, p.46, Ballantine Books

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• We’re in the Customer Service business—we just happen to provide airline transportation.

  Colleen Barrett

  Transportation, Service Business, Happens

  Ken Blanchard, Colleen Barrett, David Russo, David Ross, Richard Templar (2012). “Building Better Business Teams: Proven Strategies that Get the Best from Your People (Collection)”, p.89, FT Press

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• In modern America, food is abundant everywhere except aboard commercial airplanes.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• By 1931, after a few years' experience of flying scheduled airlines, those planes were operating at roughly 600 times the safety of the space shuttle. I look at safety not in terms of fatalities per passenger-mile, but when you get in and close the door, what is the risk of dying on this flight?

  Burt Rutan

  Doors, Years, Space

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• Here in the news media, our focus is on speed. When we get hold of some new and possibly inaccurate information, our highest priority is to get it to you, the public, before our competitors do. If the news media owned airlines, there would be a lot less concern about how many planes crashed, and a lot more concern about whose plane hit the ground first.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Media, Priorities

  Dave Barry (2003). “Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, but Some Actual Journalism”, p.14, Crown Archetype

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• As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, "Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete."

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• There is just no way that I can understand in God's green earth that an airline could undertake with its normal procedures the operation of the Space Shuttle. . . . You don't put parachutes on airliners because the margin of safety is built into the machine. The 727 airplanes we fly are proven vehicles with levels of safety and redundancy built in. The shuttle is a hand-made piece of experimental gear.

  Frank Borman

  Airplane, Moon, Space

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• It is an inconvenience, being located in a city where taxes are ludicrously high, where you pay twice your annual income to rent an apartment that could easily be carried on a commercial airline flight.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, New York, Humorous

  Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.64, Ballantine Books

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• England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

  Dave Barry

  Funny, Humorous, School

  "Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need". Book by Dave Barry, 1991.

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• The captain has just turned on the fasten-seat-belt-sign. He didn't mean to, but the joint he was smoking fell in his lap, and when he jumped up, his head hit the switch.

  George Carlin

  Funny, Humorous, Food

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• I can't imagine a set of circumstances that would produce Chapter 11 for Eastern.

  Frank Lorenzo

  Aviation, Imagine, Chapters

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• With the 2001 terror attacks, airline bankruptcies, pension terminations, loss of pay, changes in work rules — we're all working harder and longer than we used to.

  Chesley Sullenberger

  Loss, Terror Attacks, Pay

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