Rob Delaney Quotes

Quotes about:

• Running is special. We've all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It's just elemental. Running is like fire.

  Rob Delaney

  Funny, Running, Fear

  46 Copy quote

• It's probably not love if you don't press your face to the toilet seat after they've used it to feel their warmth.

  Rob Delaney

  Love, Relationship, Laughing

  Twitter post from Oct 4, 2013

  13 Copy quote

• I can't 'make' you love me. But I can fill my pantry with your favourite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75.

  Rob Delaney

  Relationship, Snacks, Laughing

  12 Copy quote

• The best thing you can do when you're not feeling funny is go out and get more stimuli from the world, get out and walk around, read a book, go talk to some birds or a dog and replenish the well, as it were.

  Rob Delaney

  Dog, Book, Bird

  14 Copy quote

• If you have an opinion on what other adults do consensually with other adults when they take their pants off, you're a weirdo.

  Rob Delaney

  Adults, Pants, Opinion

  FaceBook post by Rob Delaney from Feb 10, 2012

  11 Copy quote

• A long-term relationship is about showing up and working hard and banking on each other. If one's down, the other might be up and can help the other one up, and sometimes you're both down and you just [band] together. Endurance is a big theme of it for me. That might not sound romantic, but I kind of think that it is.

  Rob Delaney

  Thinking, Long, Endurance

  "'Catastrophe' Creators Talk Rom-Coms and Romantic 'Endurance': 'It's Love Under Pressure'". Interview with Paige Phelan, www.hollywoodreporter.com. July08, 2015.

  11 Copy quote

• We can and should complain about certain horrors of the modern world, but when it comes to the treatment of mental illness, the advances made in the last hundred years have been far more significant than the space program, nuclear fission, or even The Wire, for so many fortunate people.

  Rob Delaney

  Years, Space, People

  Rob Delaney (2013). “Rob Delaney: Mother. Wife. Sister. Human. Warrior. Falcon. Yardstick. Turban. Cabbage.”, p.35, Hachette UK

  4 Copy quote

• I can say that I'm a feminist and I try to be progressive and all that stuff. But I when I'm tired or when I've been thrown up on for the second time that I'm just a tired man trying to keep it together. I've had a lot of jobs over the years and people who make television - it's ridiculous how much they're lauded and paid. It's irresponsible and stupid. But it is hard work. It's very difficult to balance having three young kids and working like that. So I owe my wife an enormous debt of gratitude. I feel guilty that the kids had to be grown in her body and she hasn't been able to work.

  Rob Delaney

  Gratitude, Stupid, Tired

  Source: www.elle.com

  6 Copy quote

• It's hard for me to get embarrassed, but the things that do embarrass me would be if anybody ever heard my wife and I talking in our robust, made-up language.

  Rob Delaney

  Talking, Wife, Would Be

  8 Copy quote

• On stage, I'm me. I'm a husband, I'm a dad, I'm a guy, I'm a mess - but I am a cohesive thing that you recognize as one human entity saying these things that he generally believes.

  Rob Delaney

  Husband, Dad, Believe

  7 Copy quote

• Cats probably wouldn't need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn't smoke cigarettes.

  Rob Delaney

  Cat, Tiny, Needs

  Rob Delaney (2013). “Rob Delaney: Mother. Wife. Sister. Human. Warrior. Falcon. Yardstick. Turban. Cabbage.”, p.10, Spiegel & Grau

  21 Copy quote

• I love gay people. Or as I sometimes call them, 'people.'

  Rob Delaney

  Gay, People, Sometimes

  FaceBook post by Rob Delaney from Feb 23, 2012

  16 Copy quote

• Depression taught me the importance of compassion and hard work, and that you can overcome enormous obstacles.

  Rob Delaney

  Depression, Hard Work, Compassion

  "Rob Delaney: 'Twitter has rocketed me to a whole new level of standup'" by Hadley Freeman, www.theguardian.com. September 17, 2013.

  4 Copy quote

• I no longer believe in freedom of speech.

  Rob Delaney

  Believe, Freedom Of Speech, Speech

  Twitter post from Oct 8, 2011

  5 Copy quote

• I don't think of marriage as the drudge work that a lot of sitcoms and movies might have shown it to be, I think it's more deadly murderous rage, unadulterated passion, soul-crushing purgatorial dread... It's more interesting.

  Rob Delaney

  Crush, Passion, Thinking

  Source: www.denofgeek.com

  12 Copy quote

• I was an extroverted kid and performed, like, acting and singing. Then, the older I got, I realized I enjoyed performing things that I came up with myself more and I enjoyed making people laugh more than making people cry or think.

  Rob Delaney

  Kids, Thinking, Laughing

  7 Copy quote

• I think your ambition for something changes as you go.

  Rob Delaney

  Ambition, Thinking, Things Change

  Source: www.digitalspy.com

  9 Copy quote

• The danger for a comedian on Twitter is the same danger that any civilian faces: sometimes you gotta put that phone down and go live your life. When you're on Twitter, you're not living, and if you're not living, you're not taking in stimuli with which you can create new material.

  Rob Delaney

  Phones, Live Your Life, Comedian

  "Rob Delaney Talks New Online Special, Clint Eastwood’s RNC Speech & Being Mitt Romney’s Nemesis". Interview with Katla McGlynn, www.huffingtonpost.com. April 09, 2012.

  8 Copy quote

• Don't even FRONT like you love your family, America, or God, if you don't have a DETAILED & REHEARSED Black Friday tactical shopping plan.

  Rob Delaney

  Friday, Love You, Shopping

  Rob Delaney (2013). “Rob Delaney: Mother. Wife. Sister. Human. Warrior. Falcon. Yardstick. Turban. Cabbage.”, p.114, Spiegel & Grau

  5 Copy quote

• But I also know in standup, there's nowhere to hide. You get on stage and you deliver, or you are eviscerated and you are thrown into a pile of bodies at the bottom of a mountain.

  Rob Delaney

  Mountain, Body, Stage

  4 Copy quote

• It's a good idea to have a break, to let your mind rest and so you can start to cultivate ideas.

  Rob Delaney

  Ideas, Mind, Break

  Source: www.comedy.co.uk

  7 Copy quote

• On Twitter, I just want to make you laugh at all costs.

  Rob Delaney

  Laughing, Want, Cost

  4 Copy quote

• People who concern themselves with the rights of other adults who engage in consensual acts involving sex, love, and/or eating croissants together are damaged and in pain.

  Rob Delaney

  Sex, Pain, Rights

  16 Copy quote

• With Twitter, you just want to make people laugh in their meeting; on stage, people have paid for their tickets with their hard-earned money, so I owe them the truth as I experience it.

  Rob Delaney

  People, Laughing, Want

  "Rob Delaney: 'Twitter has rocketed me to a whole new level of standup'". Interview With Hadley Freeman, www.theguardian.com. September 17, 2012.

  4 Copy quote

• In high school, I definitely fancied myself an intense guy, which is so lame.

  Rob Delaney

  School, Guy, Lame

  4 Copy quote

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