Clubs Quotes - Page 28

• Ladies and gentleman of Florida, this is the real Jeff Ament...take a very good look because there's an imposter running around...if someone comes up to you and says he's Jeff Ament and says he wants to take your pot or wants to take you to a strip club, it's probably not him.

  Eddie Vedder

  Running, Real, Florida

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• Do you think I would enter into a contract with that mob? Absolutely no chance. I would not sell them a virus. That is a 'No' by the way. There is no agreement whatsoever between the clubs.

  Cristiano Ronaldo

  Thinking, Agreement, Viruses

  "Sir Alex Ferguson's best quotes". www.theguardian.com. May 8, 2013.

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• I liked John a lot. He was the one I really got on with the most. We weren't buddy-buddies but we were always friendly. But after the Beatles and the Stones stopped playing clubs, we didn't see each other that much until he separated from Yoko, around 1974. We got really friendly again. And when he went back with Yoko, he went into hibernation ... when I went to visit someone in the Dakota, I'd leave him a note saying: 'I live next door: I know you don't want to see anyone, but if you do, please call.' He never did.

  Mick Jagger

  Doors, Friendly, Hibernation

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• A cardio-funk class - I should have at least taken one of those. But it's always terrified me. I'm never one to be a dancer on the dance floor, even at a bar or a club.

  Neil Patrick Harris

  Taken, Should Have, Class

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• Football hooligans? Well, there are 92 club chairmen for a start.

  Matt Busby

  Football, Wells, Chairman

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• I don't want anything. I don't want a job. I don't want to be respectable. I don't want prizes. I turned down the National Institute of Arts and Letters when I was elected to it in 1976 on the grounds that I already belonged to the Diners Club.

  Gore Vidal

  Art, Jobs, Diners

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• I'd never consciously left home to see a zombie movie. They were fine by me, but I had no intention of ever being in one. But I've been learning more about it as I've been doing interviews. I didn't even know there were specialist zombie magazines and clubs. I heard the other day that a radio station had asked people if they`d made preparations for an attack by zombies, and a staggering number of people replied yes!

  Billy Connolly

  Home, Numbers, People

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• From the small clubs of the Harlem Renaissance where he began playing saxophone to world tours for the biggest of the big bands, Benny Carter redefined American jazz. From the start, his fellow musicians said the way he played the sax was amazing. They say that about me, too. (Laughter.) But I don't think they mean it in quite the same way.

  William J. Clinton

  Laughter, Mean, Thinking

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• If you belonged to a political party or a social club that was tied to as much bigotry, misogyny, homophobia, violence, and sheer ignorance as religion is, you'd resign in protest. To do otherwise is to be an enabler, a mafia wife.

  Bill Maher

  Party, Ignorance, Wife

  "Religulous". www.imdb.com. 2008.

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• People like rumors. They're going to say things like, 'You was at the club with Lil' Kim, and you and Kanye West got into a fist fight.' You can't get upset. You've got to keep hope alive.

  Bernie Mac

  Fighting, People, Upset

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• When I started in the clubs, I had to work places where didn't nobody else want to work. I had to do clubs where street gangs were, had to do motorcycle gangs, gay balls and things of that nature.

  Bernie Mac

  Gay, Motorcycle Gangs, Balls

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• The Jews celebrate Passover by eating unpalatable food to remind them what will happen to their people if they ever leave New York City. The traditional meal often includes gefilte fish. For those of you who don't know what gefilte fish is, it strongly resembles a ball of tuna fish that has been passed nasally. It's not good. During Passover, the angel of death passed over the Jews - an event that, up until the late 1950s, was re-enacted every year by Ivy League colleges and suburban country clubs.

  Jon Stewart

  Country, New York, Angel

  "Other News - Yeast of Burden". "The Daily Show" official website, March 31, 1999.

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• I'll bet right now most of the youngsters and hot club fans who hear the name Storyville hasn't the least idea that it consisted of some of the biggest prostitutes in the world ... Standing in their doorways nightly in their fine and beautiful negligees -- faintly calling to the boys as they passed their cribs.

  Louis Armstrong

  Beautiful, Boys, Names

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• I'm now unemployed. It's a weird feeling with no work, but at least there's still golf. Standup comedy is like my core, it's what I do. But I want to be a pro golfer. It's a love/hate relationship with golf. I can come away feeling so serene, and yet, it's the thing that I can let get to me to throw a club and say curses that don't even exist. I'm obsessed with something that won't let me master it. I don't know. I need therapy.

  Ray Romano

  Hate, Golf, Feelings

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• Room service is great if you want to pay $500 for a club sandwich.

  Don Rickles

  Room Service, Sandwiches, Want

  "What I've Learned: Don Rickles". Interview with Mike Sager, www.esquire.com. January 29, 2007.

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• I've seen the end of the universe, and it happens to be in the United States and, oddly enough, it's in Houston, Texas. I know - I was shocked, too. Imagine my surprise when I left a comedy club one day and walked to the end of the block, and there on one corner was a Starbucks, and across the street from that Starbucks, in the exact same building as that Starbucks, there was - a Starbucks. I looked back and forth, thinking the sun was playing tricks with my eyes. That there was a Starbucks across from a Starbucks - and that, my friends, is the end of the universe.

  Lewis Black

  Block, Eye, Thinking

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• I learned from Ethel Waters, Duke Ellington, Adelaide Hall, the Nicholas Brothers, the whole thing, the whole schmear. [The Cotton Club] was a great place because it hired us, for one thing, at a time when it was really rough [for Black performers].

  Lena Horne

  Brother, Water, Black

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• I had my schooling right there in the Cotton Club.

  Lena Horne

  Cotton, Schooling

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• Strip clubs are great places to meet interesting people you only wanna know for about 40 minutes.

  Dane Cook

  People, Interesting, Minutes

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• I'm in a new club, by the way. And I don't know if you're first timers like I am, but I'm in the 'I Just Dropped My Cell Phone In My Own Piss' Club. Have you done that? Yeah, good times. I'm on the phone and I forget that I'm using shoulder technique. Urinals were taken so I went in to use the regular john. And as I'm standing there, mid-conversation, I'm like 'Are you serious?' and it just started to toboggan right down my powerful chest.

  Dane Cook

  Powerful, Taken, Cells

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• If you're 1 of the 3 girls in pics with a greaseball whose arms are around you at a club you lose at life. If you're the greaseball you win.

  Dane Cook

  Girl, Winning, Arms

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• I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.

  Dane Cook

  Yelling, People, Feelings

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• The sexy magazine in Britain in that time was called Club International. Club International: It was about as international as the International House of Pancakes. It should have been called Naked Cockney Girls with Scurvy.

  Craig Ferguson

  Girl, Sexy, Should Have

  "The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson". www.imdb.com. 2005-2015.

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• I feel the longer he stays at United the better it is for the club. He's done so much for United you can't imagine him not being here. 
  (on Sir Alex Ferguson)

  Rio Ferdinand

  Alex, Ferguson, Done

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• Liverpool is a massive club and has obviously been very successful over the years.

  Steven Gerrard

  Successful, Years, England

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