Clubs Quotes - Page 19

• I always said that if I have the perfect club then I should play the perfect game.

  Arnold Palmer

  Games, Play, Perfect

  Source: kellysgolfhistory.blogspot.com

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• I was playing cowboys and Indians in the trees, and then I started hitting the golf club with clubs father sawed off for me, and I began playing right here with my father.

  Arnold Palmer

  Father, Golf, Cowboy

  Source: kellysgolfhistory.blogspot.com

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• We are a much improved ball club: now we lose in extra innings!

  Casey Stengel

  Sports, Balls, Extras

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• I ordered a club sandwich, but I'm not even a member. "I like my sandwiches with three pieces of bread." "Well, so do I!" "Then let's form a club." "OK, but we need some more stipulations. Instead of cutting the sandwich once, let's cut it again. Yes, four triangles, arranged in a circle, and in the middle we will dump chips." "How do you feel about frilly toothpicks?" "I'm for 'em!" "Well, this club is formed."

  Mitch Hedberg

  Funny, Humor, Cutting

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• When you're doing a show on stage, and they show you a red light, that means you have 5 minutes left. At some clubs, they hold a candle up in the back. That's the worst method. You're up here, and then you see a floating candle. "Oh, no! This place is haunted!" I can't be funny when I'm frightened.

  Mitch Hedberg

  Funny, Mean, Humor

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• I know a guy who had his doctor say, "Take some weight off, go to a health club." The man lost 20 pounds in one week! The machine tore his leg off!

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Humor, Men

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• 2 Guys in a health club, one is putting on pantyhose. "Since when do you wear pantyhose?" "Since my wife found it in the glove compartment!"

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Humor, Wife

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• I was never a nightclub manager or a hostess. I want to make that very clear. I was an executive at my club. I was a director of VIP operations, that's much different than a manager, that's much different than a waitress, it's different than, you know, a host - I was like an executive-level position

  Rachel Uchitel

  Different, Levels, Want

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• I LOVE THE COMEDY CLUBS AND THE CLOSENESS OF THE CROWD. HOWEVER THE MORE YA DO THE BIG ROOMS THEY START TO BECOME YOUR HOME AS WELL AND YOU ADJUST TO THE SURROUNDINGS. I LOVE THEM BOTH. I MISS THE CLUBS BUT THATS WHAT YA WORK FOR TO DO THE BIG ROOMS!

  Larry the Cable Guy

  Home, Missing, Crowds

  Source: www.dead-frog.com

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• When I might be on a business trip, a lot of people are partying and they may be drunk or under the influence of something that I'm not under the influence of, and that might influence their actions. I'm not even blaming them, but being in the club and not knowing what everybody's motives are, I have to take precautions damn near every week, especially when I go out of town.

  Gucci Mane

  Party, Knowing, People

  Source: www.thefader.com

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• I follow the baseball team on the Internet more than I do the football team. Generally you can get a Nebraska game anywhere. Before I started doing big arenas and stuff and had a tour bus when I was just working comedy clubs way back when I would always listen to the games in my hotel room on the Internet.

  Larry the Cable Guy

  Baseball, Football, Team

  Source: www.huskermax.com

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• I have just realized that it is due to you, and to Mr. James Thomas and his staff of the Army Navy Country Club that the putting green here on the White House lawn is already in such excellent condition. I assure you that I get a great deal of pleasure and relaxation out of using the green in an occasional late afternoon hour . . .

  Dwight D. Eisenhower

  Sports, Country, Army

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• Punk rock isn't supposed to be for everyone. There is that sort of private club mentality, which is necessary. It keeps things from getting watered down and boring.

  Billie Joe Armstrong

  Rocks, Down And, Boring

  Interview with Larry Livermore, larrylivermore.com. August 14, 2009.

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• I don't have any interest in going out to clubs. I love people, and I love socializing, I just don't have any interest in being drunk.

  Taylor Swift

  People, Drunk, Going Out

  Source: www.seventeen.com

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• If I'm not on tour, I can run down to the comedy club and do a little stand-up. If you're an actor, you can't go - I guess there's forms of it.

  Louis C. K.

  Running, Actors, Littles

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• I tried documentaries.It wasn't the time for me. I was going to try to do the same thing, I did make a valiant attempt but it did not work - to do the same thing with documentaries that we had done with the book club [in 2011]. The zeitgeist wasn't ready. It just wasn't ready.

  Oprah Winfrey

  Book, Trying, Done

  Source: wwd.com

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• I interviewed - no - had lunch with Harper Lee several years ago, trying to convince Harper Lee to do "To Kill a Mockingbird" for the book club. She wouldn't do it. She said, "Honey, I said everything I wanted to say."

  Oprah Winfrey

  Book, Years, Lunch

  Source: wwd.com

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• It's fun to be in a small club and to be able to look somebody right in the eye and watch them just freak. Then it's fun to be in front of thousands of people and watch a couple of hundred freaking out of their minds.

  Lou Reed

  Couple, Fun, Eye

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• I started thinking about, I need to build a team. And let's go into the strip clubs, and let's tell these girls that it's never too late, that God still will forgive them at any point in their life.

  Heather Veitch

  Girl, Team, Thinking

  Source: www.nbcnews.com

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• You know those guys that go to the strip club at the daytime? If you're at a strip club, and the sun is out, you got some problems!

  Chris Rock

  Funny, Humor, Guy

  "Chris Rock: Never Scared". TV Special, April 17, 2004.

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• That's just something instinctual within men. We always feel like we've got to protect our stuff. Even if it's not worth protecting, we want to protect it. You ever seen people who have like a piece of crap Pinto with a Club on the steering wheel. Somebody breaks the window, steals the Club, leaves the Pinto in a pile of glass.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Humor, Men

  "Jeff Foxworthy: Totally Committed", www.imdb.com. 1998.

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• Every morning I hear the alarm, it's like "BEEP BEEP BEEP" For second I'm like, "I could get used to that, just dream I'm in a techno club, or something."

  Jim Gaffigan

  Funny, Dream, Morning

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• I phoned the local ramblers club today and this bloke just went on and on.

  Tim Vine

  Funny, Humor, Today

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• I love people-watching at the clubs in Los Angeles, where girls make fools of themselves and guys pay thousands of dollars for a couple of bottles of vodka just so they can get a table. It's quite a scene.

  Jackie Collins

  Girl, Couple, People

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• You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.

  Adam Carolla

  Funny, Home, Humor

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