Florence King Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• It's the Government's job to print the money, deliver the mail and declare war. Now give me my cigarettes.

  Florence King

  Money, Jobs, War

  9 Copy quote

• Why do I hate people? Who else is there to hate?

  Florence King

  Hate, People, I Hate People

  14 Copy quote

• Of all the old maid's blessing, the greatest is carte blanche. Spinsterhood is powerful; once a woman is called "that crazy old maid" she can get away with anything.

  Florence King

  Single, Powerful, Crazy

  11 Copy quote

• I'm for prayer in the schools because ritual and ceremony are calming and civilizing, and the little fartlings should be tamped down whenever possible.

  Florence King

  Prayer, School, Littles

  12 Copy quote

• There is much to be said for post-menopausal celibacy. Sex is rough on loners because you have to have somebody else around, but now I don't. No more diets to stay slim and desirable: I've had sex and I've had food, and I'd rather eat.

  Florence King

  Sex, Loner, Slim

  Florence King (1991). “Lump It Or Leave It”, p.10, Macmillan

  9 Copy quote

• I've always said that next to Imperial China, the South is the best place in the world to be an old lady.

  Florence King

  World, Next, Best Place

  7 Copy quote

• America is not a democracy, it's an absolute monarchy ruled by King Kid. In a nation of immigrants, the child is automatically more of an American than his parents. Americans regard children as what Mr. Hudson in Upstairs, Downstairs called betters. Aping their betters, American adults do their best to turn themselves into children. Puerility exercises droit de seigneur everywhere.

  Florence King

  Kings, Children, Kids

  Florence King (1990). “Reflections In A Jaundiced Eye”, p.30, St. Martin's Griffin

  52 Copy quote

• There is more sexism in a year's worth of movies than actually exists in a woman's entire lifetime.

  Florence King

  Years, Lifetime, Sexism

  Florence King (1991). “Lump It Or Leave It”, p.65, Macmillan

  8 Copy quote

• Keep dating and you will become so sick, so badly crippled, so deformed, so emotionally warped and mentally defective that you will marry anybody.

  Florence King

  Sick, Dating, Defective

  4 Copy quote

• When you go apartment-hunting in the South, you encounter little old ladies who ask you if you use strong drink. In New York you encounter paranoids who wonder if you will commit suicide--not that they care; what they worry about is blood on their fresh paint, a dubious smell in the hallway, or a hole in the awning as you pass through on your way to the sidewalk. The Southerner who moves to any part of the country has problems, but the culture shock that attacks the Southerner who moves North is almost indescribable.

  Florence King

  Suicide, Country, Strong

  Florence King (1976). “Southern ladies and gentlemen”

  8 Copy quote

• Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.

  Florence King

  Morning, Sex, Cigarette Smoke

  Florence King (1991). “Lump It Or Leave It”, p.10, Macmillan

  10 Copy quote

• It takes only one child to raze a village.

  Florence King

  Children, Village

  7 Copy quote

• Agoraphobia was my quirky armor against a gregarious America.

  Florence King

  America, Quirky, Armor

  Florence King (1982). “When sisterhood was in flower”, Viking Pr

  15 Copy quote

• Affirmative action was designed originally for "women and other minorities" but the phrase has become just another tortured euphemism. Female conscientiousness and eagerness to please have always made women good students and natural test takers. Jews have gloried in scholarship throughout the ages, and Asians of both sexes score so high on SATs and IQ tests that they regard affirmative action as an impediment. Affirmative action really means favoritism for blacks for the sake of racial peace, but the favor is pure chimera, and so, increasingly, is the peace.

  Florence King

  Sex, Mean, Race

  23 Copy quote

• to a Southerner it is faux pas, not sins, that matter in this world.

  Florence King

  World, Matter, Sin

  Florence King (1993). “Southern Ladies & Gentlemen”, p.12, Macmillan

  6 Copy quote

• Chinks in America's egalitarian armor are not hard to find. Democracy is the fig leaf of elitism.

  Florence King

  Women, Egalitarianism, America

  Florence King (1990). “Reflections In A Jaundiced Eye”, p.97, Macmillan

  8 Copy quote

• Kings and queens might do wicked things, but they don't nag. One thing I like about Bloody Mary: she never said a word about lung cancer.

  Florence King

  Kings, Queens, Cancer

  Florence King (1990). “Reflections In A Jaundiced Eye”, p.127, Macmillan

  12 Copy quote

• The nice thing about Southerners is the way we enjoy our neuroses.

  Florence King

  Nice, Neurosis, Way

  7 Copy quote

• There's no national glue holding us together because somebody put too much pluribus in the unum.

  Florence King

  Together, Glue, Too Much

  11 Copy quote

• Hereditary monarchy offers numerous advantages for America. It is the only form of government able to unify a heterogeneous people. Thanks to centuries of dynastic marriage, the family tree of every royal house is an ethnic grab bag with something for everybody. We need this badly; America is the only country in the world where you can suffer culture shock without leaving home. We can't go on much longer depending upon disasters like Pearl Harbor and the Iranian hostage-taking to "bring us together.

  Florence King

  Country, Home, Government

  Florence King (1990). “Reflections In A Jaundiced Eye”, p.125, Macmillan

  8 Copy quote

• Each time a mediocre singer performs, he is saying, in effect, "This is good enough for you." The audience, thrust into that familiar American mood of knowing something is wrong but not knowing what it is, unconsciously absorbs the insult and projects it back onto the mediocre performer in the form of inattention, rudeness and noise.

  Florence King

  Knowing, Mediocrity, Singers

  Florence King (1991). “Lump It Or Leave It”, p.58, Macmillan

  11 Copy quote

• Oppressed people are treacherous for the simple reason that treachery is both a means of survival and a way to curry favor with one's oppressor.

  Florence King

  Mean, Simple, People

  Florence King (1993). “Southern Ladies & Gentlemen”, p.155, Macmillan

  7 Copy quote

• A cardinal rule of writing is never interrupt yourself to explain something. If you must bring up an obscure topic, drop informative hints about it as you go along so that you don't end up with the entire explanation all in one place. This keeps you from skidding to a stop and sounding teacherish. Otherwise it's better to omit the obscure topic altogether, or as mothers might put it: if you can't say it interestingly, don't say it at all.

  Florence King

  Mother, Writing, Topics

  8 Copy quote

• I don't suffer fools, and I like to see fools suffer.

  Florence King

  Inspirational, Suffering, Fool

  6 Copy quote

• Nothing is more likely to start me screaming like a madwoman than New York in February with its piles of blackened snow full of yellow holes drilled by dogs.

  Florence King

  Dog, New York, Yellow

  Florence King (1976). “Southern ladies and gentlemen”

  7 Copy quote

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