Kinky Friedman Quotes

Quotes about:

• Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.

  Kinky Friedman

  Friendship, Dog, Money

  88 Copy quote

• Poly means more than one, and ticks are bloodsucking parasites.

  Kinky Friedman

  Mean, Tick, Parasites

  Kinky Friedman (2008). “What Would Kinky Do?: How to Unscrew a Screwed-Up World”, p.88, Macmillan

  59 Copy quote

• Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.

  Kinky Friedman

  Fields

  Kinky Friedman (2007). “You Can Lead a Politician to Water, But You Can't Make Him Think: Ten Commandments for Texas Politics”, p.65, Simon and Schuster

  42 Copy quote

• Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.

  Kinky Friedman

  Jesus, Jobs, Home

  61 Copy quote

• Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest.

  Kinky Friedman

  Funny, Running, Morning

  65 Copy quote

• People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a privilege in this world.

  Kinky Friedman

  Loyalty, Dog, Kindness

  Kinky Friedman (2011). “Kinky's Celebrity Pet Files”, p.54, Simon and Schuster

  44 Copy quote

• Whether your destination is heaven or hell, you always have to change planes in Dallas.

  Kinky Friedman

  Heaven, Dallas, Hell

  37 Copy quote

• Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.

  Kinky Friedman

  Remember, Possessive, Possessiveness

  11 Copy quote

• I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough.

  Kinky Friedman

  Long, Southern, Ems

  87 Copy quote

• God created whiskey to keep the Irish from taking over the world.

  Kinky Friedman

  World, Whiskey

  Kinky Friedman (1993). “Kinky Friedman: Three Complete Mysteries : Greenwich Killing Time/a Case of Lone Star/When the Cat's Away”, Outlet

  35 Copy quote

• You don't accomplish much by swimming with the mainstream. Hell, a dead fish can do that.

  Kinky Friedman

  Swimming, Hell, Mainstream

  10 Copy quote

• If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.

  Kinky Friedman

  Long, Enough, Paranoid

  Kinky Friedman (1993). “Kinky Friedman: Three Complete Mysteries : Greenwich Killing Time/a Case of Lone Star/When the Cat's Away”, Outlet

  24 Copy quote

• I believe that Willy Nelson is the hillbilly Dalai Lama.

  Kinky Friedman

  Believe, Hillbilly, Lama

  13 Copy quote

• When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.

  Kinky Friedman

  Animal, May, Path

  52 Copy quote

• Golf is the only opportunity that middle-aged WASPs have to dress up like a pimp.

  Kinky Friedman

  Golf, Opportunity, Pimp

  18 Copy quote

• But the most dangerous thing in the world in the world is to run the risk of waking up one morning and realizing suddenly that all this time you've been living without really and truly living and by then it's too late. When you wake up to that kind of realization, it's too late for wishes and regrets. It's even too late to dream.

  Kinky Friedman

  Running, Dream, Morning

  47 Copy quote

• If you're lookin' for a helpin' hand, try the one at the end of your arm.

  Kinky Friedman

  Hands, Trying, Arms

  10 Copy quote

• I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.

  Kinky Friedman

  Marriage, Believe, Gay

  41 Copy quote

• There's a fine line between fiction and non-fiction and I think I snorted it somewhere in 1979

  Kinky Friedman

  Thinking, Fiction, Lines

  25 Copy quote

• I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.

  Kinky Friedman

  Texas, Numbers, Tolls

  53 Copy quote

• The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.

  Kinky Friedman

  Mirrors, Guy, Republican

  26 Copy quote

• Well, I hate to be the one to take the flyswatter to Tinker Bell, but...

  Kinky Friedman

  Hate, Bells, I Hate

  Kinky Friedman (1993). “Kinky Friedman: Three Complete Mysteries : Greenwich Killing Time/a Case of Lone Star/When the Cat's Away”, Outlet

  4 Copy quote

• The main health hazard in the world today is people who don't love themselves.

  Kinky Friedman

  Health, People, Hazards

  19 Copy quote

• On the whole I prefer cats to women because cats seldom if ever use the word 'relationship'.

  Kinky Friedman

  Relationship, Cat, Use

  9 Copy quote

• I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to our pets.

  Kinky Friedman

  Cat, Pet, Emotion

  Kinky Friedman (1993). “Kinky Friedman: Three Complete Mysteries : Greenwich Killing Time/a Case of Lone Star/When the Cat's Away”, Outlet

  36 Copy quote

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