Mike Birbiglia Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• I feel like people have more in common than the news reports. People getting along doesn't sell very well in the news. I find that to be deeply depressing. I don't even talk about it on stage, because it would take too long to explain. I'd have to spend an hour on it to get people to understand what I'm saying because it's so instantly polarizing. Because cable news has kind of set up a construct where you're for or against something immediately. So if I said something about it, people would be for or against me immediately. And I don't want that.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Depressing, Long, People

  Source: www.motherjones.com

  6 Copy quote

• I think our culture views success as visibility, being seen as being successful. Whereas I've learned that success is rooted in helping and connecting to other people, and knowing where you can contribute. I've kind of spent my thirties doing that, because in my twenties I was seeking any kind of success.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Successful, Thinking, Views

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  5 Copy quote

• I think the reason why I'm so alluring to networks is because on the surface I'm like a quintessential relatable, boring white guy. A great many sitcoms have been anchored by a boring white guy, so I feel like what they want to mine from me are my more generic qualities.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Thinking, White, Guy

  Source: www.esquire.com

  7 Copy quote

• I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Humor, Soul

  9 Copy quote

• I thought, Hey, maybe these people shouldn't be making up holidays to drink more. Maybe if they drank less they might be able to title their newspaper articles more specifically. For example, I would title this last article "Drunk Driver Hits Drunk Walker Drunkety-Drunk I'm So Drunk."

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Holiday, Humor

  Mike Birbiglia (2012). “Sleepwalk with Me: And Other Painfully True Stories”, p.115, Simon and Schuster

  10 Copy quote

• Eugene Mirman is the Andy Warhol of comedy. People look to him for what's next in comedy, and he emails these people back promptly. The Will to Whatevs put me in a great mood because I was laughing out loud. Alone. That's hard to do.

  Mike Birbiglia

  People, Laughing, Email

  10 Copy quote

• I've read that Steven Wright's style was born out of genuine nervousness.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Style, Born, Genuine

  11 Copy quote

• I will say what I aspire to is a consistency in making films, to direct something every couple of years.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Couple, Years, Consistency

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  9 Copy quote

• I struggled with that notion early in my career. 'I know this is funny but nobody is laughing.' This thought occurred for years.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Years, Careers, Laughing

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  4 Copy quote

• There are so many people who are clever. There are 8000 people at Princeton who are more clever than the three of us at this table. BUT, we have the ability to give something that they don't have...which is us.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Clever, People, Giving

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  4 Copy quote

• I didn't realize how good I was with technology until I met my parents... my dad told me "You're good; you should be a computer programmer." I said, "You're bad... you should be a caveman."

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Dad, Humor

  4 Copy quote

• The list of fun and easily fixed brain diseases is very short.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Fun, Brain, Disease

  Mike Birbiglia (2012). “Sleepwalk with Me: And Other Painfully True Stories”, p.168, Simon and Schuster

  4 Copy quote

• I'm a whitebread cracker. That's my favorite white person slur: "whitebread". The other day, someone came up to me and said, "What's up, whitebread?" And I was like, "That's not even an insult. That's just my race plus a food. I can do that, too, black bean soup! Stay out of this, Asian chicken platter!"

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Humor, Race

  "Comedy Central Presents / Mike Birbiglia: 2". www.imdb.com. 2006.

  4 Copy quote

• When I made 'Sleepwalk with Me,' many people asked me if was a novelty thing, a one-off. But this is the goal, I'm just hitting it 12 years after I thought I would.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Years, People, Goal

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  4 Copy quote

• I was an altar boy as a kid. And the answer is no.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Humor, Kids

  "Comedy Central Presents / Mike Birbiglia: 2". www.imdb.com. 2006.

  4 Copy quote

• A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Girl, Humor

  4 Copy quote

• Comedy is tragedy plus time, but the time is different for everybody.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Tragedy, Different, Comedy

  4 Copy quote

• Failure's hard. There's no way around. Bombing on stage never feels great. You feel judged, you feel alone. But then when your performance works, it's transcendent.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Judged

  Source: www.flickreel.com

  7 Copy quote

• I shouldn't say bad things about the illiterate, though..I should write it. That way they won't find out.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Writing, Humor

  4 Copy quote

• Sex and pizza, they say, are similar. When it's good, it's good. When it's bad, you get it on your shirt.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Sex, Funny Relationship, Shirts

  5 Copy quote

• I performed for the U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay. And signed autographs for people who've been gone from America for so long they didn't realize that I'm not famous.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Humor, America

  4 Copy quote

• When you're in a relationship with someone who's selfish, what keeps you in it is the fact that when they shine on you, it's this souped-up shine. And you feel like you're in the club. And you don't even know what club it is. You just know you want to stay in it.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Selfish, Humor

  Mike Birbiglia (2012). “Sleepwalk with Me: And Other Painfully True Stories”, p.47, Simon and Schuster

  10 Copy quote

• When I was in college my improvisation troupe and I did a road trip to Chicago, and went to The Second City to see the classic 'Paradigm Lost' revue - with Tina Fey, Rachel Dratch, Scott Adsit and Kevin Dorff. It blew my mind, and proved to me you can do sketch comedy like you're doing 'Long Day's Journey into Night.' We could treat it like theater.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Night, Journey, College

  Source: www.hollywoodchicago.com

  4 Copy quote

• People getting along doesn't sell very well in the news. I find that to be deeply depressing. I don't even talk about it on stage, because it would take too long to explain.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Depressing, Long, People

  Source: www.motherjones.com

  4 Copy quote

• My friends drink everywhere. They even drink at the laundromat. I tried drinking at the laundromat, and I thought I was in a submarine, navigating the Sea of White Panties with my Spanish-speaking crew. I was like, "Mrs. Sanchez, set the coordinates to Permanent Press! Give me some quarters and another drink! This place is starting to look like a laundromat."

  Mike Birbiglia

  Funny, Drinking, Humor

  11 Copy quote

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