P. G. Wodehouse Quotes - Page 2

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• It is no use telling me there are bad aunts and good aunts. At the core, they are all alike. Sooner or later, out pops the cloven hoof.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Aunt, Use, Jeeves

  The Code of the Woosters (1938) ch. 2

  25 Copy quote

• Unseen in the background, Fate was quietly slipping lead into the boxing-glove.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Fate, Boxing, Unseen

  P. G. Wodehouse, Donald R. Bensen (1985). “A Wodehouse Bestiary”, p.262, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

  25 Copy quote

• It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Life, Sorry, Humorous

  The Man Upstairs (1914) title story

  13 Copy quote

• There are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, 'Do trousers matter?'" "The mood will pass, sir.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Matter, Jeeves, Moments

  P.G. Wodehouse (2009). “Wonderful Wodehouse 2: A Collection: Thank You Jeeves, Right Ho Jeeves, The Code of the Woosters”, p.784, Random House

  24 Copy quote

• Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Eye, Son, Parent

  38 Copy quote

• As Shakespeare says, if you're going to do a thing you might as well pop right at it and get it over.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Might, Pops, Wells

  P.G. Wodehouse (2009). “Wonderful Wodehouse 1: A Collection: The Inimitable Jeeves, Carry On Jeeves, Very Good Jeeves”, p.726, Random House

  27 Copy quote

• If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Men, Mind, Would Be

  12 Copy quote

• You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Party, Guy, Leaving

  "The Girl in Blue". Book by P. G. Wodehouse, 1970.

  5 Copy quote

• the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Kindness, Milk, Gallons

  4 Copy quote

• The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Butterfly, Golf, Upset

  P. G. Wodehouse (2011). “The Clicking of Cuthbert”, p.128, The Floating Press

  18 Copy quote

• It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Running, Funny Things, Giving

  P. G. Wodehouse, David A. Jasen (1997). “Enter Jeeves: 15 Early Stories”, p.6, Courier Corporation

  14 Copy quote

• I attribute my whole success in life to a rigid observance of the fundamental rule - Never have yourself tattooed with any woman's name, not even her initials.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Names, Fundamentals, Success In Life

  6 Copy quote

• Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Sober, Motto

  25 Copy quote

• When you're alone you don't do much laughing.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Laughing

  10 Copy quote

• I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Fate, Feelings, Fancy

  P.G. Wodehouse (2009). “Wonderful Wodehouse 1: A Collection: The Inimitable Jeeves, Carry On Jeeves, Very Good Jeeves”, p.394, Random House

  14 Copy quote

• And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Girl, Two, Brain

  P. G. Wodehouse (2008). “The Adventures of Sally (Volume 1 of 2) (EasyRead Super Large 20pt Edition)”, p.207, ReadHowYouWant.com

  11 Copy quote

• It has been well said that an author who expects results from a first novel is in a position similar to that of a man who drops a rose petal down the Grand Canyon of Arizona and listens for the echo.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Writing, Men, Echoes

  "Cocktail Time". Book by P. G. Wodehouse, 1958.

  16 Copy quote

• My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Love, Glasses, People

  19 Copy quote

• Rugby football is a game I can't claim absolutely to understand in all its niceties, if you know what I mean. I can follow the broad, general principles, of course. I mean to say, I know that the main scheme is to work the ball down the field somehow and deposit it over the line at the other end and that, in order to squalch this programme, each side is allowed to put in a certain amount of assault and battery and do things to its fellow man which, if done elsewhere, would result in 14 days without the option, coupled with some strong remarks from the Bench.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Football, Strong, Mean

  26 Copy quote

• Always get to the dialogue as soon as possible. I always feel the thing to go for is speed. Nothing puts the reader off more than a big slab of prose at the start.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Speed, Bigs, Slabs

  9 Copy quote

• She fitted into my biggest arm-chair as if it had been built round her by someone who knew they were wearing arm-chairs tight about the hips that season

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Food, Arms, Hips

  My Man Jeeves (1919) "Jeeves and the Unbidden Guest"

  4 Copy quote

• She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Funny, Humor, Tunnels

  P. G. Wodehouse (2016). “Expecting Jeeves”, p.25, Courier Dover Publications

  7 Copy quote

• She had more curves than a scenic railway

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Curves, Railway, Scenic

  9 Copy quote

• That is life. Just one long succession of misunderstandings and rash acts and what not. Absolutely.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Long, Succession, Just One

  P. G. Wodehouse (2011). “A Damsel in Distress”, p.196, The Floating Press

  13 Copy quote

• It was one of those days you sometimes get latish in the autumn when the sun beams, the birds toot, and there is a bracing tang in the air that sends the blood beetling briskly through the veins.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Autumn, Air, Blood

  P.G. Wodehouse (2012). “The World of Jeeves: (Jeeves & Wooster)”, p.626, Random House

  7 Copy quote

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