Toilets Quotes - Page 16

• I remember Tallulah (Bankhead) telling of going into a public ladies' room and discovering there was no toilet tissue. She looked underneath the booth and said to the lady in the next stall, 'I beg your pardon, do you happen to have any toilet tissue in there?' The lady said no. So Tallulah said, 'Well, then, dahling, do you have two fives for a ten?'

  Ethel Merman

  Two, Rooms, Next

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• Don't be upset. Don't listen to me. I only meant that I am jealous of a dark, unconscious element, something irrational, unfathomable. I am jealous of your toilet articles, of the drops of sweat on your skin, of the germs in the air you breathe which could get into your blood and poison you. And I am jealous of Komarovsky, as if he were an infectious disease. Someday he will take you away, just as certainly as death will someday separate us. I know this must seem obscure and confused, but I can't say it more clearly. I love you madly, irrationally, infinitely.

  Boris Pasternak

  Confused, Love You, Jealous

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• Whathat!" Tyson gasped. "Those are the stables for the pegasi," I replied, "You know, winged horses?" "Whasthat!" "Um... those are the toilets.

  Rick Riordan

  Horse, Tyson, Knows

  4 Copy quote

• She cleans a toilet inside and out under a minute. More like terrifying

  Becca Fitzpatrick

  Hush Hush, Minutes, Patch And Nora

  Becca Fitzpatrick (2012). “Hush, Hush”, p.120, Simon and Schuster

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• My biggest fear is the ocean. It's a great big, powerful sea toilet.

  Alex Borstein

  Powerful, Ocean, Sea

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• Oh, its big enough,” he said patronizingly, “but somehow I was expecting…you know.” He gestured with his hands, indicating something roughly the size of a house cat. “It’s the Mortal Cup, Jace, not the Mortal Toilet Bowl,” said Isabelle. -Jace & Isabelle, pg.349-

  Cassandra Clare

  Cat, Hands, House

  Cassandra Clare (2009). “City of Bones”, p.349, Simon and Schuster

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• I was the only westerner to succeed in a place that's like a toilet, and you always come out of a toilet with a smell.

  David Reuben

  Smell, Succeed, Westerners

  7 Copy quote

• I didn't have to think up so much as a comma or a semicolon; it was all given, straight from the celestial recording room. Weary, I would beg for a break, an intermission, time enough, let's say, to go to the toilet or take a breath of fresh air on the balcony. Nothing doing!

  Henry Miller

  Inspirational, Thinking, Air

  Henry Miller (1964). “Henry Miller on Writing”, New Directions Publishing

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• It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly drop away.

  Janet Evanovich

  Wall, Lying, Sitting

  Janet Evanovich (2011). “Stephanie Plum One, Two, Three: One for the Money, Two for the Dough, Three to Get Deadly”, p.65, Simon and Schuster

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• Restrooms at gas stations were an unpleasant and shocking surprise; I had never considered the serious drawbacks of such lazily-cleaned rooms. I was completely unable to ignore the filth, and wasted a burst of power to turn the sink, floors and porcelain toilet into sparkling, clean examples of their kind before using the facility. I felt that was a much less judgmental response than simply blowing the place off the face of the Earth, which was also a distinct temptation, especially when the storekeeper overcharged me for a bottle of cold water.

  Rachel Caine

  Water, Temptation, Example

  4 Copy quote

• I rubbed the contents of one bag onto my upper arm on the evening of June 7, just before I went to bed. I thought: Well, it can't hurt. I flushed the packaging down the toilet.

  Patrik Sinkewitz

  Hurt, June, Arms

  Source: www.spiegel.de

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• When I walk out into the street or go to the toilet, I don't think of myself as being black. Of course, other people think of me as black when I walk into a pub. Obviously being black is a part of me.

  Steve McQueen

  Thinking, People, Black

  Source: www.artmonthly.co.uk

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• You can't put toilet paper in the toilet [in the space ship], so there's a separate vacuum can in front of you on the wall and when you're done, you put the toilet paper in there and seal that up.

  Mike Mullane

  Wall, Space, Vacuums

  Source: www.menshealth.com

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• Bad writing is not easier than good writing. It's just as hard to make a toilet seat as it is a castle window. Only the view is different.

  Ben Hecht

  Writing, Views, Castles

  19 Copy quote

• Once upon a time I was riding on the top of a First Avenue bus, when I heard a mythical housewife say to another, "Molly, my dear, I would have bought that new brand of toilet soap if only they hadn't set the body copy in ten point Garamond." Don't you believe it. What really decides consumers to buy or not to buy is the content of your advertising, not its form.

  David Ogilvy

  Believe, Once Upon A Time, Riding

  4 Copy quote

• You have to offer sort of an evolution visually and do things like you've never seen before, like a fight between two men in a toilet on an airplane which was very exciting.

  Jaume Collet-Serra

  Airplane, Fighting, Men

  Source: collider.com

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• It means food on every table, every child in school, a job for everybody and a house with toilet and electricity for every family. This will make India proud. We can achieve this through unity. Unity strengthens us. Division weakens us.

  Narendra Modi

  Jobs, Children, School

  "Modi's Speech on Religious Freedom: Too Little, Too Late?" by Ankit Panda, thediplomat.com. February 20, 2015.

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• I don't think the press has done a very good job dealing with government spending.The Defense Department with the $9,500 toilet seat, that's not the problem anymore. Medicare and Medicaid and Social Security are the problem. That's us. That's our generation. There the press never says a word.

  Dave Barry

  Jobs, Thinking, Government

  ""All I Think Is That It's Stupid": An Interview with Dave Barry". Interview with Glenn Garvin, reason.com. December, 1994.

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• Besides, the sense of safety offered by bottled water is a mirage. It turns out that breathing, not drinking, constitutes our main route of exposure to volatile pollutants in tap water, such as solvents, pesticides, and byproducts of water chlorination. As soon as the toilet is flushed or the faucet turned on-or the bathtub, the shower, the humidifier, the washing machine-these contaminants leave the water and enter the air. A recent study shows that the most efficient way of exposing yourself to chemical contaminants in tap water is to turn on a dishwasher.

  Sandra Steingraber

  Drinking, Air, Breathing

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• There are 41 million people who do not have access to a toilet in Pakistan and as a result they are defecating in the open. And open defecation has significant health and nutritional consequences.

  Geeta Rao Gupta

  Health, People, Pakistan

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• If the entire week is a battlefield, reading the Bible is sort of like that parachute with the box of reserves that come in the middle of the war: food and water and the toothbrush and toilet paper.

  Lauryn Hill

  War, Reading, Water

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• I wrote my first book in a toilet in a factory where I was a floor sweeper.

  Geoff Thompson

  Book, Firsts, Factories

  Source: www.indielondon.co.uk

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• I think people might think, oh, I don't want to approach the big famous author because it's embarrassing, but then they think for two seconds about it and realize, this is, like, a toilet bowl reader.

  Augusten Burroughs

  Thinking, Two, People

  Source: www.bookslut.com

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• There is an apocalyptic view to this that is actually kind of appealing, which is the only way to kill big government is to let it kill itself. It's suicide by gluttony. Right now, the government is approaching Fat Elvis during those years in the '70s right before he croaked on the toilet seat. Basically ObamaCare is a huge tray of bacon and banana sandwiches. And it could happen in our lifetimes.

  Greg Gutfeld

  Suicide, Views, Years

  Source: www.foxnews.com

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• You should never eat when you're on the toilet. "But I'm lactose-intolerant, and I always wanted to enjoy a bowl of Puffins with whole milk!" That's more of an almond milk cereal, but live
  your dream.

  Daniel Tosh

  Dream, Cereal, Puffins

  "Happy Thoughts". Comedy album by Daniel Tosh, 2011.

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