Great Alcohol Quotes - Page 2

• 

  You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

  Dean Martin

  Clever, Lying, Humorous

  In Paul Dickson Official Rules (1978) p. 112

  215 Copy quote

  Show source

• I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.

  Abraham Lincoln

  Inspirational, Wisdom, Truth

  Abraham Lincoln (1999). “The Wit & Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln: A Treasury of Quotations, Anecdotes, and Observations”, Gramercy

  79 Copy quote

  Show source

• Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Witty, Clever

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  97 Copy quote

  Show source

• I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Witty, Drinking

  98 Copy quote

• I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.

  Rodney Dangerfield

  Party, Drinking, Beer

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  16 Copy quote

  Show source

• I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.

  Noel Coward

  Drinking, Beer, Alcohol

  34 Copy quote

• Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Missing You, Strong, Drinking

  Robert A. Heinlein (1987). “Time Enough for Love”, p.325, Penguin

  53 Copy quote

  Show source

• I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

  Winston Churchill

  Military, Drinking, Taken

  In Quentin Reynolds By Quentin Reynolds (1964) ch. 11

  43 Copy quote

  Show source

• I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won't let himself get snotty about it.

  Raymond Chandler

  Drinking, Beer, Men

  Raymond Chandler (2014). “The World of Raymond Chandler: In His Own Words”, p.87, Vintage

  24 Copy quote

  Show source

• Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.

  Lord Byron

  Drinking, Beer, Men

  'Don Juan' (1819-24) canto 2, st. 179

  43 Copy quote

  Show source

• When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place.

  Jimmy Breslin

  Drinking, Food, Beer

  Jimmy Breslin (1986). “Table money”

  68 Copy quote

  Show source
• 

  The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.

  Humphrey Bogart

  Drinking, Book, Beer

  172 Copy quote

• Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Motivational, Drinking, Beer

  The Devil's Dictionary

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.

  Robert Benchley

  Drinking, People, Alcohol

  "The New Speaker's Treasury of Wit and Wisdom". Book by Herbert Victor Prochnow, 1958.

  10 Copy quote

  Show source

• Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

  Robert Benchley

  Funny, Witty, Humorous

  "Fictional character: Mr. Albert Osborne". "The Major and the Minor", www.imdb.com. September 16, 1942.

  58 Copy quote

  Show source

• Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

  W. C. Fields

  Food, Drinking, Beer

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  47 Copy quote

  Show source

• Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

  Dave Barry

  Fun, Drinking, Book

  "Vegetable Magnetism" by Dave Barry, www.washingtonpost.com. March 17, 1991.

  25 Copy quote

  Show source

• No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or so good as drink.

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Drinking, Beer, Animal

  All Things Considered (1908) "Wine When it is Red"

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.

  Francois Rabelais

  Drinking, Beer, Thinking

  26 Copy quote
• 

  An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

  Ernest Hemingway

  Book, Drinking, Beer

  Ernest Hemingway (2008). “The Good Life According to Hemingway”, Ecco

  116 Copy quote

  Show source
• 

  Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

  Ernest Hemingway

  Funny, Witty, Clever

  Ernest Hemingway (2008). “The Good Life According to Hemingway”, Ecco

  131 Copy quote

  Show source

• If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer.

  Clement Freud

  Funny, Witty, Giving Up

  Quoted in Observer (London), 27 Dec. 1964.

  23 Copy quote

  Show source

• First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.

  F. Scott Fitzgerald

  Funny, New Year, Drinking

  F. Scott Fitzgerald (2011). “On Booze (New Directions Pearls)”, p.92, New Directions Publishing

  17 Copy quote

  Show source

• A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

  Albert Einstein

  Drinking, Alcohol, Inventory

  121 Copy quote
• 

  Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

  George Bernard Shaw

  Funny, Life, Drinking

  119 Copy quote