Funny Inspirational Quotes - Page 3

• Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them.

  Dick Van Dyke

  Success, Women, Discipline

  53 Copy quote

• It's good to shut up sometimes.

  Marcel Marceau

  Inspirational, Funny, Life And Love

  39 Copy quote
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  If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.

  Dalai Lama

  Inspirational, Funny, Change

  1283 Copy quote
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  Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

  George Carlin

  Inspirational, Life, Music

  George Carlin (2002). “Napalm & Silly Putty”, Hyperion

  192 Copy quote

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• Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.

  Sam Ewing

  Funny, Frustration, Talking

  44 Copy quote

• If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.

  Jim Rohn

  Inspirational, Life, Motivational

  FaceBook post by Jim Rohn from Oct 06, 2015

  158 Copy quote

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  The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.

  Vince Lombardi

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  217 Copy quote

• Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Life, Hilarious

  257 Copy quote

• Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

  Erma Bombeck

  Inspirational, Funny, Humorous

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  100 Copy quote

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• Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

  Ahmad

  Inspirational, Funny, Fit

  17 Copy quote

• To think is easy. To act is hard. But the hardest thing in the world is to act in accordance with your thinking.

  Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

  Integrity, Inspirational Life, Funny Motivational

  67 Copy quote

• It's kind of fun to do the impossible.

  Walt Disney

  Inspirational, Positive, Success

  "Animated Architecture". Book by Derek Walker, 1982.

  61 Copy quote

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• Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.

  Thomas A. Edison

  Positive, Mean Girls, Failure

  "Artifacts : An Archaeologist's Year in Silicon Valley". Book by Christine Finn, 2001.

  23 Copy quote

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• I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Learning

  Life on the Mississippi ch. 6 (1883)

  23 Copy quote

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• Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

  Napoleon Bonaparte

  Witty, Business, War

  "The Military Quotation Book" by James Charlton, (p. 93), 2002.

  397 Copy quote

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• Be so good they can't ignore you.

  Steve Martin

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  67 Copy quote

• In the business world, everyone is paid in two coins: cash and experience. Take the experience first; the cash will come later.

  Harold Geneen

  Life, Motivational, Graduation

  "Managing". Book by Harold Geneen, 1984.

  89 Copy quote

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• You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Laughter, Humorous

  431 Copy quote

• He who laughs.....lasts.

  Erma Bombeck

  Inspirational, Funny, Happiness

  Erma Bombeck (2013). “Forever, Erma: Best-Loved Writing From America's Favorite Humorist”, p.46, Open Road Media

  39 Copy quote

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• I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom.

  George S. Patton

  Inspirational, Motivational, Positive

  332 Copy quote

• When everyone thinks alike, no one thinks very much.

  Walter Lippmann

  Funny, Education, Thinking

  18 Copy quote

• All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.

  Erma Bombeck

  Children, Parenting, White

  41 Copy quote
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  The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

  Lucille Ball

  Happy Birthday, Beauty, Funny Birthday

  181 Copy quote
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  Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.

  Mindy Kaling

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  Mindy Kaling (2011). “Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)”, p.7, Three Rivers Press

  30 Copy quote

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• Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

  David Frost

  Love, Friendship, Relationship

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

  89 Copy quote

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