Motivation is a lotta crap.
The reason I drink is because when I'm sober I think I'm Eddie Fisher.
Brother, you can't go to jail for what you're thinking, or that look in your eye, just standing on the corner watching all the girls go by.
Return to me, for my heart wants you only. Hurry home, hurry home, won't you please hurry home to my heart.
I know it's the gentlemanly thing to let the wife file. But, then, everybody knows I'm no gentleman.
Johnny Carson is a comedian who is seen every night in millions of bedrooms all over America...and that's why his last wife left him.
There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks better than he does.
We try to find chemistry; we don't do a lot of situational baseball.
I take the juice of two bottles of whisky.
Haven't got a girl, but I can wish. So I'll take me down to Main Street and that's where I'll select my imaginary dish.
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