My favorite animal is steak.
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
Breakfast cereals that come in the same colors as polyester leisure suits make oversleeping a virtue.
Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.
People have been cooking and eating for thousands of years, so if you are the very first to have thought of adding fresh lime juice to scalloped potatoes try to understand that there must be a reason for this.
Bread that must be sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing.
Japanese food is very pretty and undoubtedly a suitable cuisine in Japan, which is largely populated by people of below average size. Hostesses hell-bent on serving such food to occidentals would be well advised to supplement it with something more substantial and to keep in mind that almost everybody likes french fries.
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