Funny Stress Quotes

• I try to take it one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.

  Ashleigh Brilliant

  Funny, Success, Women

  28 Copy quote

• Brain cells create ideas. Stress kills brain cells. Stress is not a good idea

  Arthur Frederick Saunders

  Stress, Ideas, Cells

  14 Copy quote

• In times of stress, the best thing we can do for each other is to listen with our ears and our hearts and to be assured that our questions are just as important as our answers.

  Fred Rogers

  Inspirational, Stress, Heart

  Fred Rogers (1995). “You Are Special: Words of Wisdom for All Ages from a Beloved Neighbor”, p.94, Penguin

  22 Copy quote

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• We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.

  David Mamet

  Stress, Food, Pie

  David Mamet (2010). “Boston Marriage”, p.34, Knopf Group E-Books

  35 Copy quote

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• There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

  Henry A. Kissinger

  Inspirational, Funny, Witty

  The New York Times Magazine, June 01, 1969.

  35 Copy quote

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• When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened

  Winston Churchill

  Life, Depressing, Funny Inspirational

  Winston Churchill (1959). “Memoirs of the Second World War: An Abridgement of the Six Volumes of the Second World War”

  21 Copy quote

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• The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.

  Sydney J. Harris

  Funny, Witty, Time

  115 Copy quote

• For fast-acting relief try slowing down.

  Lily Tomlin

  Inspirational, Breakup, Stress

  71 Copy quote

• Its not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.

  Hans Selye

  Inspirational, Stress, Anxiety

  102 Copy quote

• If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.

  Marcus Aurelius

  Inspirational, Positive, Depression

  741 Copy quote

• Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness.

  Richard Carlson

  Inspirational, Stress, Relaxation

  Richard Carlson (2016). “You Can Be Happy No Matter What”, p.161, Mango Media Inc.

  7 Copy quote

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• If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

  Doug Larson

  Funny, Witty, Retirement

  44 Copy quote

• Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't fallen asleep yet

  Steve Valentine

  Stress, Wake Up, Realizing

  11 Copy quote

• Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.

  Lily Tomlin

  Funny, Leadership, Stress

  29 Copy quote

• Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath.

  Natalie Goldberg

  Stress, Earth, Forget

  Natalie Goldberg (2011). “Wild Mind: Living the Writer’s Life”, p.206, Open Road Media

  9 Copy quote

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• Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Life, Wisdom

  Letter in New York Times 29 Apr. 1930

  62 Copy quote

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• One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.

  Bertrand Russell

  Success, Work, Stress

  Conquest of Happiness (1930) ch. 5

  96 Copy quote

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• Stress happens when your mind resists what is...The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.

  Dan Millman

  Stress, Mind, Resistance

  64 Copy quote

• If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.

  George Burns

  Funny, Stress, Humor

  George Burns (1989). “How to live to be 100--or more: the ultimate diet, sex, and exercise book”, Plume

  83 Copy quote

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  Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency.

  Natalie Goldberg

  Inspirational, Funny, Letting Go

  FaceBook post by Natalie Goldberg from Jul 25, 2011

  76 Copy quote

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  In times of great stress or adversity, it's always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.

  Lee Iacocca

  Inspirational, Motivational, Positive

  Lee Iacocca, William Novak (2011). “Iacocca: An Autobiography”, p.16, Bantam

  111 Copy quote

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• Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath. Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. Nothing is that important. Just lie down.

  Natalie Goldberg

  Life, Stress, Lying

  Natalie Goldberg (2011). “Wild Mind: Living the Writer’s Life”, p.206, Open Road Media

  11 Copy quote

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• A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.

  Aesop

  Peace, Stress, Food

  Aesop (1947). “The Fables of AEsop”, Ann Arbor [Mich.] : University Microfilms

  18 Copy quote

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• Ignore reality, there's nothing you can do about it.

  Natalie Imbruglia

  Sister, Letting Go, Brother

  Song: Don't You Think?, Album: Left of the Middle, 1997

  85 Copy quote

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• Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is... The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.

  Dan Millman

  Life, Pain, Attitude

  32 Copy quote