I hate charts. I just despise 'em.
I think I'm becoming a psychologist in explaining the Republican Party. It's the only way you can explain 'em. It's psychological.
I've always believed in the old-fashioned way: When you've got scoundrels in office, you vote 'em out.
There's a reason people are not going to Obamacare. They find out what it's gonna cost 'em, and they go somewhere else. And in the process, they're undermining the very foundation of Obamacare, all of which was predictable.
Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up.
I think a newspaper should be provocative, stir 'em up, but you can't do that on television. It's just not on.
My record company had to beg me to stop filmin' music videos in the projects. No matter what the song was about, I had 'em out there.
It's hard to do it because you gotta look people in the eye and tell 'em they're irresponsible and lazy. And who's gonna wanna do that? Because that's what poverty is, ladies and gentlemen. In this country, you can succeed if you get educated and work hard. Period. Period.
They think that, if we were just smart enough, we'd be able to understand their policies. And I so want to tell 'em, and I do tell 'em, Oh, we're plenty smart, oh yeah - we know what's goin' on. And we don't like what's goin' on. And we're not gonna let them tell us to sit down and shut up.
I like linebackers. I collect 'em. You can't have too many good ones.
I'm gonna be making records anyway, even if I had to sell 'em out of the trunk of my car. I'm that kind of musician and singer.
You campaigned against rich people and you got enough envy whipped up in the country and you're gonna get 'em. You're gonna stick it to those rich people. But guess what? You may not get anymore revenue. You may not get anymore economic growth. But you can say, 'I stuck it to the rich people.'
I sometimes wonder how we're short of cod. There's gonna be a load deep down that are hiding. But it's a good reason to put the price up, and it means a load of people will have haddock. They should tell people they're running out of all sorts. Make 'em panic a bit.
Man, when I'm riding with the helmet on, I'm invisible. And people just deal with me as the guy on the bike... it gives you a chance to read 'em.
I don't trust doctors. It's not to say there ain't some good ones, but on a general level, no, I wouldn't trust 'em at all.
Well, actually, I manage a couple of stock portfolios or funds or whatever you want to call 'em, and I think I've done relatively well with them.
If I flop, let 'em pan me.
I've been playing Texas Hold 'em and other forms of poker since I was about 12.
Women can go on marrying and pretending that their boyfriends and husbands are Mr. Darcy or some RomCom dream man. But where's that going to get 'em? Besides divorce court?
I don't want to hear the specials. If they're so special, put 'em on the menu.
I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
The songs are about things that we were thinking and we wrote 'em down, and when you listen to 'em, whatever you think it's about... THAT'S what it's about!
Been in this game one-hundred years, but I see new ways to lose 'em I never knew existed before.
You know, legends are people like Haggard and Jones and Wills and Sinatra. Those people are legends. I'm just a young buck out here trying to keep in that same circle with the rest of 'em.
What does it mean when people applaud? Should I give 'em money? Say thank you? Lift my dress? The lack of applause - that I can respond to.
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