Bars Quotes - Page 7

• The five rings of marriage: there's the engagement ring and the wedding ring, but there are three others, too: the boring, the suffering and the lawyering. I watched it for 20 years from behind a bar in Ft. Lauderdale. I prefer to stay single.

  Steve Trotter

  Years, Suffering, Three

  Source: in.askmen.com

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• The hardest thing to get right is to figure out how to bring all those characters together, and to fulfill the promise of The Avengers. They really set a very high bar for themselves because you've been setting this coalition up, for these five movies, and they better deliver. And in my opinion, they thoroughly deliver.

  Clark Gregg

  Character, Promise, Together

  Source: collider.com

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• Ronaldinho was responsible for the change in Barça. It was a bad time and the change that came about with his arrival was amazing. In the first year, he didn't win anything but people fell in love with him. Then the trophies started coming and he made all those people happy. Barça should always be grateful for everything he did.

  Lionel Messi

  Grateful, Winning, Years

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• Canada is like a nice family living over a biker bar . . . They keep telling the downstairs neighbors to keep down the noise, people are trying to sleep.

  Dustin Hoffman

  Nice, Sleep, People

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• If you set your bar at 'amazing' it's awfully difficult to start. Your first paragraph, sketch, formula, sample or concept isn't going to be amazing. Your tenth one might not be either. Confronted with the gap between your vision of perfect and the reality of what you've created, the easiest path is no path. Shrug. Admit defeat. Hit delete. One more reason to follow someone else and wait for instructions. Of course, the only path to amazing runs directly through not-yet-amazing. But not-yet-amazing is a great place to start, because that's where you are.

  Seth Godin

  Running, Reality, Perfect

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• Now, have I ever been tempted to break into a Krispy Kreme doughnut store in the middle of the night? Oh, yeah. God help us if I had a mini-bar stocked with cheesecake and chicken-fried steak.

  Mike Huckabee

  Night, Krispy Kreme, Helping

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• A cardio-funk class - I should have at least taken one of those. But it's always terrified me. I'm never one to be a dancer on the dance floor, even at a bar or a club.

  Neil Patrick Harris

  Taken, Should Have, Class

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• It's lonely at the top. Ninety-nine percent of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for the mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for "realistic" goals, paradoxically making them the most time-consuming and energy consuming. It is easier to raise $10,000,000 than it is $1,000,000. It is easier to pick up the one perfect 10 in the bar than the five 8s.

  Tim Ferriss

  Lonely, Ninety Nine, People

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• The canary is like a man's soul. It sees bars around it, but instead of despairing, it sings.

  Nikos Kazantzakis

  Men, Soul, Canaries

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• I saw the most frightening, most depressing sight I had ever seen - a row of stores with Stars of David and the word 'Jude' painted on them, and inside, behind half-empty counters, people in a daze, cringing like they didn't know what hit them and didn't know where the next blow would come from. Hitler had been in power only six months, and his boycott was already in full effect. I hadn't been so wholly conscious of being a Jew since my bar mitzvahs, and it was the first time since I'd had the measles that I was too sick to eat.

  Harpo Marx

  Depressing, Stars, Blow

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• A man is at the bar, drunk. I pick him up off the floor, and offer to take him home. On the way to my car, he falls down three times. When I get to his house, I help him out of the car, and on the way to the front door, he falls down four more times. I ring the bell and say, Here's your husband! The man's wife says, Where's his wheelchair?

  Henny Youngman

  Husband, Fall, Home

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• Chic Murray once told me he fell in the street, and a woman said to him, "Did you fall?" He said, "No, I'm tryin' to break a bar of chocolate in my back pocket."

  Billy Connolly

  Fall, Chocolate, Pockets

  "Billy Connolly: An Audience with Billy Connolly". TV Special, October 26, 1985.

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• I'm a big fan of the Mars Bar Diet. You don't eat the Mars bar, you stick it up your arse and let a rottweiler chase you home.

  Billy Connolly

  Home, Rottweilers, Fans

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• Steven Spielberg's mother, who said to E.T., I don't care where you're from, you're here and you're gonna get bar mitzvahed! Never got a dinner!

  Red Buttons

  Mother, Care, Dinner

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• A sports bar is a way to take a bar and fill it with even more annoying people than usual.

  Demetri Martin

  Sports, People, Usual

  Twitter post from May 19, 2012

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• The night I turned twenty-two, I drank a shot for every year. I was so drunk, I'd just walk up to people in the bar and hit them in the balls. My friends drove me home and left me propped up on the couch holding a bucket. I woke up with vomit all over me. The bucket was clean as a whistle.

  Jon Stewart

  Home, Night, Years

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• I go to pick up a girl in a bar. I say will you go home with me? She says I don't know, do you have cable? I say no, but the rope should work just fine.

  Emo Philips

  Girl, Home, Rope

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• Sports are an acceptable way for men to show emotion. A guy who won't hug his kid will slip a guy a tongue in a sports bar when his team wins.

  Richard Jeni

  Sports, Team, Kids

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• Here's why I think there's something a little odd with George Bush. Because a lot of the times when he speaks, his words don't match his face. Something is askew. You can't talk about the war with a smile on your face. He does it constantly. If you're the President, you should go We're going to talk about the war, I must have a frowny face. The only time you can smile when you're talking about the war in Iraq is when you go, Well, two Iraqis walk into a bar, hahaha.

  Lewis Black

  War, Thinking, Talking

  "Lewis Black: Red, White and Screwed". Documentary, Comedy, June 10, 2006.

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• My role models are Bettie Page and Mia Kirshner. Every day when Mia comes to work she raises the bar for us all.

  Jennifer Beals

  Role Models, Roles, Mia

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• I'm a glutton for coffee Heath Bar crunch ice cream.

  Josh Duhamel

  Coffee, Ice Cream, Crunch

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• It doesn't really exist, this Frat Pack. We run into each other on occasions and we all like each other's films, I guess, but there isn't some big funny restaurant or bar where we all hang out. At least, if there is, they haven't invited me.

  Will Ferrell

  Running, Film, Restaurants

  "The $29 million man" by Jason Solomons, www.theguardian.com. November 19, 2006.

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• I come around when you least expect me! I'm sitting at the bar when your glass is empty!

  Donald Glover

  Glasses, Sitting, Empty

  Song: Heartbeat, Album: Camp, 2011

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• According to Life & Style, Lance Armstrong was seen canoodling with fitness model Kim Strother, and the night before, he was with Ashley Olsen. He's going from bar to bar picking up women - how does he get them home? Does he put them on the handlebars, or does he have a banana seat?

  Chelsea Handler

  Home, Night, Style

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• For a degenerate like me, Vegas is like a walk down memory lane. Last time I went to Vegas, I went to my old coke dealer's kid's bar mitzvah.

  Artie Lange

  Memories, Kids, Vegas

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