Alcoholics Quotes - Page 9

• I told him about me being a summoner, and what that entailed. At the end of he simply gave a long sigh. “Why couldn’t you simply be an alcoholic like all the other detectives?” I grinned. “Demon summoning has less vomiting!

  Diana Rowland

  Long, Vomiting, Detectives

  Diana Rowland (2011). “Secrets of the Demon: Demon Novels, Book Three”, p.202, Penguin

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• A man who drinks too much on occasion is still the same man as he was sober. An alcoholic, a real alcoholic, is not the same man at all. You can't predict anything about him for sure except that he will be someone you never met before.

  Raymond Chandler

  Real, Drinking, Men

  Raymond Chandler (2002). “The Long Goodbye: A Novel”, p.169, Vintage Crime/Black Lizard

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• Accept the things I cannot change," I said. "And pray for the courage to change the things I can, as well as the wisdom to know the difference." The thing is... I know this is good advice. It's called the Serenity Prayer, and it really does put things in perspective (it's suppose to be for recovering alcoholics, but it helps recovering freakoutaholics, like me, as well).

  Meg Cabot

  Prayer, Differences, Perspective

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• That's what alcoholics do. It's in their job description: fall apart and then keep falling apart.

  Audrey Niffenegger

  Jobs, Fall, Description

  Audrey Niffenegger (2014). “The Time Traveler's Wife”, p.218, Simon and Schuster

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• Caffeine. The gateway drug.

  Eddie Vedder

  Humor, Alcohol, Drug

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• An alcoholic will steal your wallet and lie to you. A drug addict will steal your wallet and then help you look for it.

  David Sheff

  Lying, Drug, Looks

  David Sheff (2008). “Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction”, p.265, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

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• I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

  George Carlin

  Funny, Father, Humor

  George Carlin (2004). “When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?”, Hyperion

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• O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!" - Cassio (Act II, Scene iii)

  William Shakespeare

  Men, Alcohol, Brain

  1603-4 Cassio, of wine. Othello, act 2, sc.3, l.283-5.

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• I changed my mind. I don’t want to be an inveshtigative journalist anymore. I want to be a professional rum drinker.” “There are people who do that,” Duff said. He’d barely sipped his rum. “Really? What do you call them?” “Alcoholics.

  Libba Bray

  People, Mind, Want

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• But then, look at me. My brain is incorrectly formed, and I'm shaped like a tube. Plus, I'm an alcoholic, a "survivor" of childhood sexual abuse, was raised in a cult and have no education. So, really, if you think about it, the only thing that separates me from the guy with the stinky foot and no teeth is a book deal and some cologne.

  Augusten Burroughs

  Book, Thinking, Feet

  Augusten Burroughs (2012). “Magical Thinking”, p.211, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• And in my mind, this settles the issue. I would never drink cologne, and am therefore not an alcoholic.

  Augusten Burroughs

  Drinking, Issues, Alcohol

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• Because 'You're perfect just the way you are,' is what your guidance counselor says. And she's an alcoholic.

  Libba Bray

  Perfect, Way, Guidance

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• Note to self-give serious thought to becoming an alcoholic.

  Jill Shalvis

  Self, Giving, Becoming

  Jill Shalvis (2015). “Get A Clue”, p.24, Kensington

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• (The new boyfriend) knows I write every day for hours but has no idea that all I’m writing about is me. It seems wiser to let him think I’m an aspiring novelist instead of just an alcoholic with a year of sobriety who spends eight hours a day writing about the other 16.

  Augusten Burroughs

  Writing, Thinking, Eight

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• Reality is an illusion created by a lack of alcohol.

  N. F. Simpson

  Drinking, Food, Reality

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• I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here are a few I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was."; "Drinking will significantly improve your chances of murdering a loved one."; "If you drink long enough, at some point you will vomit up the lining of your stomach."; "Use this product and you may wake up in Morocco wearing a cowboy suit and tongue-kissing a transmission salesman."

  George Carlin

  Father, Drinking, Kissing

  George Carlin (2015). “3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George including Brain Droppings, Napalm and Silly Putty, and When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?”, p.657, Hachette UK

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• Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has led to the rise of the gang problems we have now.

  Drew Carey

  Humor, America, Alcohol

  "Stand-Up Guy". Interview with Nick Gillespie and Steve Kurtz, reason.com. November 1997.

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• Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.

  Benjamin Franklin

  Humorous, Drinking, Beer

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• In the US the overwhelming majority of those executed are psychotic, alcoholic, drug addicted or mentally unstable. They frequently are raised in an impoverished and abusive environment. Seldom are people with money or prestige convicted of capital offenses, even more seldom are they executed.

  George Ryan

  People, Drug, Majority

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• Even prostitutes, alcoholics, embezzlers - I won't rehearse the whole catalogue - need health insurance.

  William Levada

  Needs, Catholicism, Whole

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• Talk of fighting Tyson is a little premature. I'm an addict and an alcoholic

  Michael Dokes

  Fighting, Boxing, Littles

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• I look up the telephone number of Alcoholics Anonymous. Then, my hands shaking, I open the bar and drink the leftover whiskey, gin and vermouth-whatever I can lay my shaking hands on.

  John Cheever

  Hands, Numbers, Bars

  John Cheever (2011). “The Journals”, p.112, Random House

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• Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.

  Robert Benchley

  Drinking, People, Alcohol

  "The New Speaker's Treasury of Wit and Wisdom". Book by Herbert Victor Prochnow, 1958.

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• When you live in an alcoholic family or an abusive family, you tiptoe, you don't want to step on any mines.

  Glenn Beck

  Want, Tiptoes, Steps

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• Drug prohibition has caused gang warfare and other violent crimes by raising the prices of drugs so much that vicious criminals enter the market to make astronomical profits, and addicts rob and steal to get money to pay the inflated prices for their drugs.

  Michael Badnarik

  Humor, Marijuana Prohibition, Alcohol

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