Sam Kinison Quotes About Jesus

Quotes about: Jesus

• I started saying things in church that didn't meet with a lot of approval - like 'Jesus isn't coming back.' They started throwing Bibles.

  Sam Kinison

  Jesus, Church, Approval

• There's always 30 or 40 Christians standing around, saying, "It's a shame that he has to die." And Jesus is saying, "Well, maybe I wouldn't have to if somebody would get a ladder and pair of pliers!!"

  Sam Kinison

  Christian, Jesus, Pliers

  HBO Special, 1985.

• Jesus had a tough life. I read about that guy. Jesus is the only guy that ever came back from the dead that didn't scare the F- out of everybody!

  Sam Kinison

  Jesus, Guy, Scare

• I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock n roll and ex-wives. In that order.

  Sam Kinison

  Jesus, Rocks, Order

• Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'

  Sam Kinison

  Jesus, Water, Heaven

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