Kevin Hearne Quotes - Page 4

Quotes about:

• Druid log July 15: Dark elves are not only quick and efficient killers, but creative and pyrotechnically inclined ones.

  Kevin Hearne

  Dark, July, Creative

  Kevin Hearne (2012). “Trapped: The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book Five”, p.162, Del Rey

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• She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five.

  Kevin Hearne

  Embarrassment, Ecstasy, Five

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.415, Del Rey

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• Granuaile:"So why don't cult leaders achieve godhood?" Atticus:" Because they're megalomaniacs drenched in douche juice.

  Kevin Hearne

  Leader, Juice, Achieve

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• Anyone who's ever tried to tangle with a teddy bear cholla knows there's a whole lot more bear than teddy to it.

  Kevin Hearne

  Bears, Teddy Bear, Whole

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.56, Del Rey

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• The royal hound's belly demands rubbing. Step lively, humans, neglect me not." ~Oberon

  Kevin Hearne

  Demand, Royal, Steps

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• Ye know what me Sean used to say, God rest his soul? He said, 'A friend will help ye move, Katie, but a really good friend will help ye move a body.

  Kevin Hearne

  Moving, Good Friend, Soul

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.104, Del Rey

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• Whoa. He had ghouls on speed dial. My lawyer kicks so much ass.

  Kevin Hearne

  Ghouls, Lawyer, Ass

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.121, Del Rey

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• Wow you need to get some sun.” “Shut up. I'm Irish.

  Kevin Hearne

  Needs, Wow, Sun

  Kevin Hearne (2011). “Hounded (with two bonus short stories): The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book One”, p.233, Del Rey

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• That is a noble idea, though I think it far to generous," Jupiter said. "Once a decade should be sufficient." "I would rather be too generous than not in such cases." "As you wish." [One day, Atticus was amazed to discover that when Jupiter said, "As you wish," what he really meant was "I love you."]

  Kevin Hearne

  Love You, Thinking, Ideas

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.1738, Del Rey

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• As any war veteran will tell you, there is a vast difference between preparing for battle and actually facing battle for the first time.

  Kevin Hearne

  War, Differences, Battle

  Kevin Hearne (2012). “Tricked: The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book Four”, p.80, Del Rey

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• Hey Atticus, do me a quick favour before we go? its easy. Sure. What is it? Hold Granuailes staff for just a minute. You know, rest it on the ground so that its like a walking stick or something and the top of it is near your right cheek. Granuaile and I traded weapons to humor him and I stood as instructed. Thats perfect! Now say this like Sir Ian McKellen I am Atticus the White, and I come back to you now at the turn of the tide.

  Kevin Hearne

  Walking Sticks, White, Perfect

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.1625, Del Rey

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• Tell her I am Peace Dawg but I think her cats are closely allied with The Man. I'm going to stick it to them.

  Kevin Hearne

  Cat, Men, Thinking

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• You are telling me that your lawyer is a bloodsucking vampire?

  Kevin Hearne

  Vampire, Lawyer

  Kevin Hearne (2011). “Hounded (with two bonus short stories): The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book One”, p.46, Del Rey

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• If I waved that in front of a museum curator, he'd promptly lose control of his salivary glands.

  Kevin Hearne

  Museums, Glands, Curator

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.410, Del Rey

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• Granuaile looked terminally depressed when she emerged from the bathroom with raven hair and, as a result rather Goth by accident. She didn't want to get her picture taken. "Aughh!" she said miserably, looking in the vanity mirror in the truck of the cab and fingering a wavy curl near her temple. "This sucks more than anything has ever sucked before. You know what we look like? A couple of emo douche bags." "Well, look at the bright side, Granuaile. Emo Douche Bags would be a great band name." [That's brilliant! It's already the unofficial name of more bands than I can count.]

  Kevin Hearne

  Emo, Couple, Taken

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• No, she knows you're here. She can see through the camouflage. But I think she's hiding something from me, and I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. Never mind. Just listen. Once she drinks the tea, she will try ot surprise me with something. She is waiting for the contrast to be fully in effect before she says anything. I knew I never should have let you watch The Wizard of Oz.

  Kevin Hearne

  Thinking, Hiding Something, Should Have

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• You don't need to say any special incantation or sacrifice a stray cat or something first?

  Kevin Hearne

  Cat, Sacrifice, Special

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.427, Del Rey

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• Oh, I know. They’re dwarfs pretending to be elves. No, they’re not dwarfs either. Okay, okay, they’re “little people,” I’m sorry! Can’t believe I have to be politically correct when you’re the only one who can hear me.

  Kevin Hearne

  Sorry, Believe, People

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.273, Del Rey

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• Bullshit, as you Americans say. He's Irish. The Irish say bullshit too.

  Kevin Hearne

  Bullshit

  Kevin Hearne (2011). “Hexed: The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book Two”, p.114, Del Rey

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• I've often been flabbergasted by modern pharmaceutical ads on television. The list of side effects for some maladies often sound worse than the condition they're supposed to treat. Once I even heard "heart failure" listed as a side effect, and I wondered how that happened. Heart failure sounds like a pretty major event to me, and if you're willing to risk heart failure in order to avoid the mild discomfort of some other condition, then may the gods shield you from harm, since you're obviously seeking it out.

  Kevin Hearne

  Heart, Order, Risk

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.1132, Del Rey

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• There are many perks to living for twenty-one centuries, and foremost among them is bearing witness to the rare birth of genius. It invariably goes like this: Someone shrugs off the weight of his cultural traditions, ignores the baleful stares of authority, and does something his countrymen think to be completely batshit insane. Of those, Galileo was my personal favorite. Van Gogh comes in second, but he really was batshit insane.

  Kevin Hearne

  Thinking, Insane, Twenties

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.12, Del Rey

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• Do Angels have assholes?" Atticus O'Sullivan - Hexed

  Kevin Hearne

  Angel

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• The widow’s eyebrows raised. “Ye’ve got all these nasty pooches to run around with and ye still might die?” “I’m going to go fight with a god, some demons, and a coven of witches who all want to kill me,” I said, “so it’s a distinct possibility.” “Are y’goin’ t’kill ’em back?” “I’d certainly like to.” “Attaboy,” the widow chuckled. “Off y’go, then. Kill every last one o’ the bastards and call me in the mornin’.

  Kevin Hearne

  Running, Fighting, Eyebrows

  Kevin Hearne (2014). “The Iron Druid Chronicles 6-Book Bundle: Hounded, Hexed, Hammered, Tricked, Trapped, Hunted”, p.221, Del Rey

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