Conan O'Brien Quotes About Taxes

Quotes about: Taxes

• Members of the Senate are considering a tax on cosmetic surgery. When they brought it up, you should have seen the look that Nancy Pelosi's face tried to make.

  Conan O'Brien

  Should Have, Looks, Cosmetics

• Earlier today, the White House released President Bush's tax return. Not surprisingly, under dependents, the president listed Iraq

  Conan O'Brien

  Iraq, White, House

• Just taught my kids about taxes by eating 38% of their ice cream.

  Conan O'Brien

  Kids, Ice Cream, Taught

  Twitter post from Sep 04, 2011

• Yesterday the IRS announced that obese Americans are entitled to certain tax breaks. Apparently, under the new rules, you're allowed to claim two or more chins as dependents.

  Conan O'Brien

  Two, Yesterday, Irs

• Donald Trump said that if President Obama releases his birth certificate, Trump will release his tax return. Obama said he won't run for a second term if Trump releases that thing on his head.

  Conan O'Brien

  Running, President, Return

• Los Angeles residents are going to vote on a tax on anything sold in a medical marijuana dispensary. If the measure passes the city could be solvent within 45 minutes.

  Conan O'Brien

  Marijuana, Cities, Medical

• Tax day was yesterday. And marijuana growers are complaining that they can't write off a single expense thanks to federal laws. Well, apparently someone tried to claim the Phish tour as his home office and that's not going to happen.

  Conan O'Brien

  Home, Writing, Marijuana

• It's April 15, tax day. The federal tax code is over 74,000 pages long. But stick with it because after page 72,000, it gets really good.

  Conan O'Brien

  Long, Pages, Sticks

• A new report says that last year Colorado collected $44 million in marijuana taxes. Unfortunately, they can't remember where they put it.

  Conan O'Brien

  Marijuana, Years, Colorado

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