Schwarzenegger Quotes

• My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg.

  Boris Johnson

  Skills, Style, Moments

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.

  Craig Kilborn

  Running, California, People

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• Don't protest outside of a rich man's house in the daytime, you'll just scare the maid, and that's Arnold Schwarzenegger's job.

  Craig Ferguson

  Jobs, Men, House

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• Schwarzenegger said last night on the show he expects his opponents to throw all kinds of dirt at him. And you know, it's started already. Today, they released the one thing that could really hurt Arnold. Turns out he once starred in a movie with Tom Arnold.

  Jay Leno

  Hurt, Night, Opponents

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger has still not officially bowed out of this race. It looks like he's not gonna run. But I'll tell ya, if Arnold does run, he better get on the ballot, because you don't want a write-in with a name like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Because people will go - 'Schwarz, schwarz, oh Davis is easier.'

  Jay Leno

  Running, Writing, Race

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• The Sacramento Bee is reporting that Arnold Schwarzenegger is not going to run for governor. You know what would be better? Arnold should do what he does in the Terminator movies. He should go back in time and prevent Gray Davis from ever being born. That way you wouldn't have the problem.

  Jay Leno

  Running, Doe, Would Be

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• There's all this talk about Arnold Schwarzenegger. Well, you know where he is now? Visiting Mexico, which I think means that he is definitely going to run for governor. Arnold is smart. He's in Mexico campaigning with the very people who'll be living here by election time.

  Jay Leno

  Running, Smart, Mean

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• I have two questions about Arnold Schwarzenegger. What does he know, and when will he know it?

  Bill Maher

  Two, Doe, Knows

  "We can all stop laughing on Wednesday, but for now, here's a sampling of recall election humor, part deux, from the nation's wags" by James Sullivan, www.sfgate.com. October 02, 2003.

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• Eunice Kennedy Shriver, President Kennedy's sister, endorsed Arnold Schwarzenegger, said he's not a womanizer. Of course by Kennedy standards that means he never drove one off a bridge.

  Bill Maher

  Mean, Bridges, President

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger has come out against gay marriage. He said marriage is a sacred union between a groupie and any number of body builders.

  Bill Maher

  Gay, Numbers, Sacred

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger campaigned in New York this week, where he stepped up his controversial goal of helping children.... It's all summed up in his campaign slogan, 'Arnold Schwarzenegger: Cutting violence in half with a laser-guided chain gun across a charred landscape - for the children.'

  Jon Stewart

  New York, Children, Cutting

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• We tend to value military heroes and Schwarzenegger types who are physically courageous. The heroics of doing the right thing every day even when it is dull and inconvenient are undervalued.

  Mary Pipher

  Military, Hero, Dull

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• Politicians have to make unpopular decisions. Schwarzenegger is going to understand the nature of his job. I wish him good luck, he's going to need it. It's going to be difficult for him.

  Clint Eastwood

  Jobs, Good Luck, Decision

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger announced that he is going to run for governor on our program last night. My staff didn't know, Arnold's staff didn't know, I was shocked as everyone else. If he doesn't get elected governor, maybe he should work for the CIA. I mean, he can keep a secret better than they can.

  Jay Leno

  Running, Mean, Night

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• Today Arnold Schwarzenegger made another major announcement. He said his lieutenant governor will be Xena, Warrior Princess.

  Jay Leno

  Princess, Warrior, Today

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger is gonna be the new governor of California. During his acceptance speech Arnold said 'I will not let you down.' Unfortunately, at the time Arnold was holding a woman over his head and looking up her dress.

  Conan O'Brien

  Acceptance, California, Speech

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• In his apology, Arnold Schwarzenegger said he was sorry to the women that he groped, and he admitted that he had acted badly. Not only that, Arnold then apologized for acting badly in all of his movies.

  Conan O'Brien

  Sorry, Apology, Acting

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger is in some trouble. Today, the Los Angeles Times broke a story that quoted six women who claimed that Arnold Schwarzenegger sexually harassed them. When asked about it, President Clinton said 'six? That's not enough experience to be governor.'

  Conan O'Brien

  President, Today, Six

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• It's been reported that some of Arnold Schwarzenegger's opponents have been circulating naked pictures of Arnold on the Internet. Yeah, in a related story, Arnold is leading the other candidates by four inches.

  Conan O'Brien

  Four, Opponents, Naked

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• Yesterday, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he would run for governor of California. The announcement was good news for Florida residents who now live in the second flakiest state in the country.

  Conan O'Brien

  Running, Country, California

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger is now governor of California. He is a very shrewd man - he already has all of his sex scandals behind him.

  David Letterman

  Sex, Men, California

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• Today, the L.A. Times accused Arnold Schwarzenegger of groping six women. I'm telling ya, this guy is presidential material.

  David Letterman

  Guy, Presidential, Today

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• Arnold Schwarzenegger got into a huge debate with Arianna Huffington about immigration - going back and forth - finally immigration came in and hauled them both away.

  David Letterman

  Immigration, Debate, Back And Forth

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• Six women have come forward that say Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them without their consent. This proves he would be a hands-on governor.

  Jay Leno

  Hands, Would Be, Six

  "The Recall Show With Jay Leno" by Sharon Waxman, www.washingtonpost.com. October 09, 2003.

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• Last night, we had the first gubernatorial debate. Some people are criticizing Schwarzenegger for not going. They say Arnold goes around telling people he cares, everything is going to be great, forget about everything he did in the '70s. Hey, it worked for George Bush.

  Jay Leno

  Night, People, Hey

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