Parenthood Funny Quotes - Page 2

• Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age.

  William Feather

  Mothers Day, Mom, Children

  William Feather (1949). “The Business of Life”

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• If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.

  Bette Davis

  Mom, Mother, Children

  130 Copy quote

• The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them.

  Frank A. Clark

  Children, Parenting, Important

  68 Copy quote

• Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

  Bill Cosby

  Funny, Mom, Children

  Twitter post from Nov 02, 2009

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• Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.

  Ray Romano

  Funny, Fathers Day, Children

  67 Copy quote

• A father carries pictures where his money used to be.

  Steve Martin

  Fathers Day, Baby, Dad

  41 Copy quote

• Simply having children does not make mothers.

  John G. Shedd

  Family, Mother, Children

  36 Copy quote

• If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.

  Abigail Van Buren

  Inspirational, Motivational, Family

  68 Copy quote

• What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

  Rodney Dangerfield

  Funny, Humor, Kids

  13 Copy quote

• I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

  Phyllis Diller

  Funny, Family, Mom

  77 Copy quote

• If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family.

  Laurence Housman

  Marriage, Mothers Day, Mom

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

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• In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage.

  Bill Cosby

  Courage, Children, Dark

  Bill Cosby (1987). “Fatherhood”, Berkley Publishing Group

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• Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

  Fran Lebowitz

  Life, Children, Humorous

  FaceBook post by Fran Lebowitz from Oct 04, 2010

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• You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's.

  Robert Frost

  Family, Fathers Day, Mother

  Robert Frost, Elaine Barry (1973). “Robert Frost on writing”, Rutgers Univ Pr

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• As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

  Buddy Hackett

  Funny, Family, Mothers Day

  106 Copy quote

• Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Life, Education, Children

  61 Copy quote

• Most of us become parents long before we have stopped being children.

  Mignon McLaughlin

  Time, Children, Memorable

  "The Complete Neurotic's Notebook". Book by Mignon McLaughlin, 1981.

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